| rev:text
| - Lon's was a complete bust. Mom took me for a "nice" Christmas dinner. We succeeded on atmosphere, but that was about it. While the service was just okay, the food was just terrible. Keep in mind this was a Christmas Day prix fixe menu at $68/pp, which by Phoenix standards should be the best meal I've had all year.
Appetizers - some sort of sushi thing that was drowned in seaweed, tasted okay but was barely noticeable on the plate. Also a lobster cake which was okay, came out cold, and wasn't nearly as good as the worst crab cake I've ever had.
Entrees - prime rib came out cold, and I've had better at a cheap buffet carving station. Veal scallopini was chewy (kind of like a microwaved sponge), and had the most tasteless mozzarella cheese I've ever had. When we brought this to the attention of the waitress, she asked that they remake all of our food. About a half hour later we got a better (still not good) version of the veal, and opted to try the ravioli instead of the prime rib they had run out of. At least the veal came out hot this time. The ravioli wasn't bad, but probably had more oil than any other ingredient. I felt greasy after eating it, which was a shame. Neither of our meals seemed to have any inspiration or fresh ingredients whatsoever.
Desserts - what a sin. I wonder if this place pays a pastry chef? I'm spoiled by my step mom's bread pudding, so I understand when others don't step up to the plate, but the bread pudding here is something I would never waste a calorie on again. And my "apple pie" was simply a joke. It was clearly canned filling that they didn't even bother to heat, stuffed inside a dry pie shell that tasted like a mouth full of flour. Ugh!
Our waitress sent the manager over, and he initially came off as unapologetic and insulted that we were unhappy. He had to go to the table right next to us a few minutes later. After we waited 20 minutes for our check, he came back again in a slightly better mood. He explained that the kitchen was tired after being there since the morning and had lost their creativity. OK I get it, I was tired too, but what kind of creativity do you need to heat up an unimaginative, standard menu?
The night ended with our two glasses of wine and one of our two meals comped. It was the right thing to do, although I still don't feel like we received nearly a $70 meal. With so many other locally-focused and inspired restaurants all over the valley, I would certainly recommend against dinner at Lon's. If I were to go back, it would only be for a glass of wine out on the patio (although I can list a few places I'd rather go for that, too).
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