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| - Darn! My full review was too long so I've had to truncate it.
They're in the process of mainstreaming it to become anyhotel, anycity, + a casino. And that's apparently what today's hipsters want - safe, clean and simple.
Okay, I admit the original Imperial Palace was pretty much a dump. I'd never stayed in the rooms until now, but based on the prices going back 30 years, it's always been at the bottom end. The casino, I do remember - dark, smoky, and with multiple levels to reach odd groupings of restaurants and shows. However, at least it was themed as per the hotel's name. The exterior (when it still had a somewhat normal entrance off LV Blvd) was rather nice - Asian font neon on the sign (when there was still room for a sign in front), matching roof decor on each tower, and a blue strip of neon to connect it all together.
I remember first hearing about the conversion to "The Quad" and just being disgusted by the total lack of imagination with the name. But, I'd seen that the partial lobby remodel had been revealed, and finding a $30 price tag for a Thursday night in a really great Strip location, I decided it was time to see for myself.
So, the parts that are done are fine - they're modern, simple and clean. There's not a single flashing, energy-draining light anywhere. If model homes come with all the latest simplistic and refined designs, we'll call this a model casino. It has NO theme and is simply - safe. Oh, and add in a thumping soundtrack turned up loud in all the common areas, and the place suddenly has a "vibe" to help replace what's been lost from the lack of coin clinks in the slot machines.
Check-in was pretty simple, thanks to arriving at about 2:30 on a Thursday. The sign said that early check-in may be available "for a nominal fee". I was not about to pay anything extra for the "privilege" of getting into my room 90 minutes before the published time, so I was ready to march my happy ass back to the car and leave the luggage there. But since they weren't full, the friendly front desk agent told me it was no problem to check in now, and didn't even mention extra fees. She did make it clear, however, that even if I wasn't going to put down a credit card for incidentals, that she "did need to collect the resort fee up front". I chuckled to myself, since there are NO amenities here, but went ahead and paid it because I'd already read ahead of time that it existed. The front desk is currently located in a narrow corridor where a temporary wall has been constructed to block off the back casino, which is currently being rebuilt, so it feels very congested. I was already having respiratory attacks from the smoke in this area, so that, combined with the boxed-in feeling in the area almost caused me a panic attack but I sucked it up and did some slow breathing, and thankfully made it out of there with my key.
The clerk also assumed I wanted King non smoking, which is correct, but I was very surprised and happy. She then asked if I wanted a low or high floor, followed by did I want noisy or quiet. I said high floor and quiet, but in retrospect, I bet if I had said "noisy" I may have gotten a strip view. Oh well. So, quiet apparently means the back tower that runs perpendicular to the Strip. And high floor meant..the very top floor! For 30 bucks, I was pretty impressed with being given so many options and for that, I was grateful.
Unfortunately, that's where my excitement ended. The elevators are so tiny, you seriously feel like any more than 5 people is a sardine can going up and down those shafts. VERY uncomfortable. That, combined with the obviously-lower-class clientele, who were all uniformly either drunk or high, made those rides to and from the top floor miserable. But I digress.
So, the room. You can tell it was value-engineered. I'd seen on the website that there were classic and deluxe rooms; the main difference being that the deluxe featured the newer white linens and no bedspreads, whereas the classic still had the old print bedspreads and matching curtains/wallpaper borders. I guess I got lucky :| The room was clean enough and everything was in working order, but it was just...depressing. So bland, no personality whatsoever. Everything's white. There's no visual stimulation at all. I LOVE being in hotel rooms, and I couldn't wait to get out of here.
The balcony is frightening, and I love hotels with balconies. You step outside, with just a huge, heavy slab of concrete rebarred into surrounding supports keeping you from plummeting to your death. I reached up and felt the blue tiles of the hotel's roof. Every time I stood out there, my balls crept up inside my skin. I'm not afraid of heights.
You know how when you're 20 and broke and go apartment shopping in the crappy parts of town? And you walk in to view your studio and it's unfurnished and all the fixtures, plumbing and electrical are old and worn from another t? That's this hotel.
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