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| - As a bar, Essen can be a lot of fun. Servers in dirndls and lederhosen, an extensive stein collection hanging from the ceiling, a live polka band on weekends, and the infamous boots that encourages group bonding through drinking. For Thanksgiving dinner, however, my experience was lackluster.
With no Thanksgiving plans on actual Thanksgiving this year my BF suggested trying Essen's family-style AYCE dinner. For about $25 per person they'll provide you with turkey, sides, and pie. For two people you get cereal-sized bowls of everything plus some sliced turkey breast and shredded dark meat. For larger parties you get a whole turkey and larger serving bowls of the sides. Pie orders are taken on slice-by-slice basis. We made our reservation about a week ahead for 2:15.
First, I want to say the servers were hustling all day. No complaints about the servers themselves. The hosts and the owners were also going like crazy. Essen was packed to the gills - when we arrived at two the line was out the door.
First issue: the waiting area was very disorganized and it was difficult to push down to the front to check in. Two must be a peak time because, as mentioned, the line was out the door. People were being seated near constantly, but we still didn't get a table until 45 minutes after our reservation. All in all I spent an hour waiting in the cold outside, then under the coat rack near the door, then in a hallway by the banquet room, then awkwardly on a ramp by the bar. Not exactly the best start to the day, but what could be done? Next year I hope they'll space out the reservations a bit more for anyone who makes their way there.
After being seated it took almost ten minutes for someone to come the table for drink orders and to drop off a bread basket - with one cold roll for each of us. They didn't taste like they were fresh-baked. Food arrived not too long thereafter.
The food:
- Turkey: extremely dry even after being covered in gravy. I actually don't mind my meat on the drier side (I'm a well-done lady through and through) but this was chug-a-glass-of-water-after-each-bite dry. I didn't try the dark meat but it arrived shredded, which seemed weird.
- Mashed potatoes: they had some herb in them and did not taste like potatoes or butter. They were real, but whatever seasonings were added were very off putting.
+ Stuffing: the savory highlight of the meal. Not mind-blowing, but by far my favorite thing of the spread.
- Gravy: fine.
- Yams: quite sweet but kind of disappointing in that they were just whole mushy yams instead of the traditional marshmallow casserole presentation. Unclear if they were fresh or from a can.
- Mixed veggies: nasty, frozen, dry, and tasteless. Looked like they'd been sitting under a heat lamp for hours. I tried a carrot medallion and it tasted nothing like a carrot but slightly like the green beans that were in the mix.
- Cranberry sauce: canned/jellied. Chopped up from its natural cylindrical shape.
+ Pie: I went with pecan and it was delicious. I'm pretty sure it came from a box (the crust looked factory-crimped) but I enjoyed it. I don't know if I've ever had pecan pie so I don't have much to compare it to, but in any case it was the best thing about the meal. Served with a small dollop of Cool Whip-style whipped topping.
For $25 I found the whole experience disappointing, especially because it included so many items that were straight from a can or box. My BF thought it was great, and several people leaving were commenting how good it was, so maybe I'm in the minority?
The other thing that I found bothersome was that you couldn't take any leftovers home besides the turkey. I understand this is to dissuade people from piling up their plates then ordering new bowls of sides and boxing it all up to go, but if you didn't get a second serving of something or ate most of what you had from a second round it seemed so silly to throw it away. We had a half a bowl each of mashed potatoes and stuffing from our second round that I crammed into our tiny turkey box when they server went to get our pie, but we had to leave our full first bowl of yams behind. I wouldn't have taken the veggies if you paid me, but if I had wanted them we had the entire first bowl of those as well.
I'm truly curious how many pounds of food went into the trash over the course of their eight-hour Thanksgiving service. So sad.
I will happily return to Essen for their normal bar hours, but I don't think I'll be spending any future holidays there. My disappointment in the meal led me to make my own stuffing, mashed potatoes, rolls, and cranberry sauce the next day to scratch my Thanksgiving itch.
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