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| - the night that preceded my first experience at Chompies was one that I wouldn't boast about; a night where sons forgot about the way their fathers raised them, a night where the bank had questioned whether or not my finances were being exhausted by me or not (I assured them that my $418 transaction was legitimate, I couldn't afford to have my debit card blocked this night), a night where listening to Justin Bieber was enjoyable... I was roaring drunk by 8:30pm and had consumed about fifteen caffeine pills to make sure I stayed up all night. before you begin to judge me let it be noted that I came home early from work the day before to discover my girlfriend of three years laying in my chambers with a man I considered my friend, Adam Levine. I couldn't be completely cantankerous; he is probably the most handsome man ive ever had the pleasure of meeting, I believe I offered him one of my extra tickets to the Cornelius Brothers concert before he had left (he respectfully declined). back to the night... not only was I absolutely intoxicated, but my attitude had reached a recalcitrant level, so much so that I had Stone Cold Stunnered the police officer that was directing us into a cab home. I heard later on that the officer I knocked unconscious was on his last shift before retirement, he had been concussed and humiliated all because of me. When we returned to my home I couldn't fall asleep because of the shame... I called my mother and confessed what I had done, but when I checked my call log the next morning I noticed that I ended up calling my seventh grade math teacher Mr. Dini instead of my mother (the call was thirty-seven minutes long). the morning had felt worse than the night; my mouth begging for just a drop of Dasani purified bottled water to which there were none left in my home. my colleague had mentioned Chompies so we gathered ourselves as best as we could and went mobile. when we arrived, we were told the wait was "about twenty minutes" when actually we had only held our horses for eight minutes or so. to my great relief there was water waiting for us on the table when we had been seated; I was filled with delight and my parched mouth was no longer an issue, a tear had run down my face at this point. I feasted on Marks Monte Cristo sandwiches which included the finest Boars Head ham I had ever tasted. the fries were fried to perfection and my much needed water was refilled consistently. it is clear that I will never have another prime first experience like the one I had at Chompies. I had attempted to change my last name to Chompy but the state of Arizona did not approve. if you're in need of an impeccable restaurant there is only one that comes to this careful mind, and that restaurant is Chompies.
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