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| - "It looks like a methadone clinic in there."
This was my friend's assessment of The Western as we ran west on Fremont away from the facility and towards the warm, welcoming lights of Fremont East.
I've never been to a methadone clinic, but I've watched enough Intervention to know when someone has had their life fill of drug and alcohol abuse. Those folks are the majority client base of The Western.
Here's what you need to know about The Western.
1. It's closing. Soon. Get a whiff of the floors that smell like they were sprayed with Marlboro-edition Febreze while you can people.
2. The drinks are cheap. I got a 70/30 ratio Maker's and Coke for $1 and had I the liver of a first semester college freshman, this drink would've sustained me for a night and left me with a very ugly hangover. Yes, the drinks come in smaller than average glasses, but when the drink is all liquor, what does it matter? You get way more than you pay for and I think it's only because they were trying to clean out the bar.
3. The people watching is free and at your own risk. In the roughly 120 minutes I spent at The Western (twice in one night...yes, we left and then CAME BACK), I saw three pimps-one with Coolio braids and a stunning lavender duster and matching pants, a homeless man karaoke-ing to "Wind Beneath My Wings" (Better Middler....LOOK OUT), many homeless and/or mentally ill people self-medicating at the bar with cheap alcohol and lots of booze induced bump and grinding. Lots of midriffs that shouldn't have been visible. Lots of teeth missing from gums. Lots and lots and lots to look at. It was sensory overload at its best. Do not make eye contact. Do not stare. Pretty similar to being in a hostage situation but with cheap drinks.
4. It is two blocks east of 7th on Fremont. For those of you who frequent Fremont East, you know that 7th is the cut off. You don't walk past 7th, you don't LOOK past 7th. The most interaction you have with 7th is street parking and even then once you hit Fremont, you just run until you get to 6th.
The Western does not even meet the minimum for dive bar status, and I wouldn't recommend you go out of your way to pay homage to this dying institution. However, if you're already on Fremont and happen to be invited to "check it out," I'd go for the raw entertainment value. And value drinks. I'm serious you guys 70/30 mixed cocktails. Possibly 80/20.
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