I hate you wal mart.
Your employees are an elusive bunch. They leave me wondering if there are secret employee only portals that they dash into just as I spot them to ask a question.
Your cashiers break my eggs in my favorite yelp reusable shopping bag and cant identify a single vegetable. Its a cucumber! I'd understand you befuddlement if it were a kumquat or starfruit, buts its a cucumber.
And about that produce, did you work out a deal with Fry's to pick up their stuff just before it turns? By the time I get it to my fridge it is a soggy sad picture of its former leafy self.
And for Christ's sake why can I NEVER get EVERYTHING on my list? I am making beef stew, not stocking the basket for the next episode of chopped.
My husband thinks you are more convenient, because he can pick up the latest as seen on TV gadget, socks, little Debbie's snacks, and motor oil all in one stop, but since we ALWAYS have to go to another store he's wrong. This is a fundamental disagreement in our relationship, one that I blame on his mother, and every time I leave your store I feel like my husband and I are one step closer to divorce.
You consistently provide me with nothing more that a headache and a sad sad picture of my fellow man. And brown lettuce.
I hate you.