It's midnight and I walk into my Primrose hotel room and I have to wake up early tomorrow morning, and the guy in the next room is snoring so loudly that it's as if he's in my bed. So I call the front desk to see if I can switch rooms.
Me: "The guy in the room next to me is the loudest snorer I've ever heard, and--"
Front desk guy: "Ok, I'll send security right up."
Me: "What? No. I just--"
Desk: "Hold on."
[hold music]
Desk: "Ok, so we'll send security up."
Me: "No! No, no. He's just a loud snorer. There's no need for security."
Desk: "But if it's a noise complaint, we send security."
Me: "What? No, that's ridiculous. It isn't his fault. I just want to see if there's another room I can go to."
I went on hold again. He found another room, and I had to go downstairs to get the keys. So I do, carrying all my stuff. He looks at me and says, with total confusion: "You're checking out now?"
This guy.