Misfortune Cookies from China House.
Had I cracked them open before sampling the four different take-out items, my fortunes should have read something like this:
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Mystery Meat Chow Mein is in your future.
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You will soon be very disappointed with your order.
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Don't expect happiness from China House.
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Maybe just plain bad luck, but out of three visits in 7 years, with at least 3 dishes each time, we've never had anything even "fair". Nothing was ever salty, but neither did any dish taste even remotely Chinese. I've never eaten canned Asian meals---don't know if there is such a thing---but this is what I'd expect it to taste like.
This last visit was the worst of all. Maybe other dishes are okay, but what we ordered I'd never recommend.
CHICKEN CHOW MEIN * . . . Worst "velveting" preparation I've ever had. Every chicken piece looked like---and had the texture of---fat. Pale yellow and sponge-like. After trying just two pieces, all chicken was shoved to the side of the plate, then thrown out. I've made chow mein several times, and whatever China House did to get this unappetizing result was either a huge mistake or ignorance of Chinese cooking techniques. Out of necessity, I added my own soy, sesame oil, and oyster sauce to the remaining ingredients, in order to flavor this unseasoned dish---which consisted of just celery, bok choy, and a total of 6 or 7 single onion wedge slices. No other ingredients. No bean sprouts, water chestnuts, mushrooms, or bamboo shoots.
VEGETABLE EGG FOO YOUNG * * . . . peas, carrots, bean sprouts, and eggs--- that's all. No water chestnuts, mushrooms, discernible onions, or snow peas. As basic as basic can get---and without flavor---except for the unpleasant "earthy"-tasting fried exterior with burned edges. The only redeeming aspect was the brown sauce and steamed white rice.
PORK FRIED RICE * * * . . . the plainest-tasting and looking we've ever had. Very few pork pieces, but at least no chunks of fat or gristle.
EGG ROLLS * . . . a large (1.5" x 1.5") piece of hard, barely-cooked cabbage in the one I had. Very firm exterior. Was probably re-fried or re-heated---to warm it throughout---when we ordered. If there was any ingredient other than cabbage, we didn't taste it or see it.
CARRY-OUT CONDIMENTS . . . no stars, since none were given. No soy sauce, or hot mustard and sweet sauce for egg rolls, in the bag. Used my own. Contacted them and was given no apologies for the omission. She said that they never give condiments unless they're asked for. (Noticed no sign to indicate this when order was picked up.)
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Because it had been about 4 years since our last visit, I ordered what I believe are the easiest to prepare and probably among the most frequently chosen. I try these dishes first from all Chinese places where we've never eaten, BEFORE any other dishes. If a restaurant can't get THESE right, I can't imagine they'll do a satisfactory job on others.
CHINA HOUSE has the worst Chinese food we've ever eaten---all three times. We gave it three tries and will never return. When you think of all the wonderful ingredients that make up flavorful, inviting Chinese dishes---whether authentic or Americanized---from the unique vegetables, to the sauces and seasonings---but then to serve up such surprisingly bland results---with the absolutely bare minimum of poorly-prepared ingredients---I'd say it's time to return to square one, and begin using recipes from even the most basic of Chinese cookbooks.