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Attributes	Values
type	rev:Review
dateCreated	2013-09-21 00:00:00 (xsd:dateTime)
itemReviewed	Mary Lynn's Massage and Day Spa
http://www.openvoc.eu/poi#funnyReviews	6 (xsd:int)
rev:rating	1 (xsd:int)
http://www.openvoc.eu/poi#usefulReviews	11 (xsd:int)
rev:text	Burn, baby, burn! I just returned from a 2 1/2 hour "spa" day. The "spa" was unlike anything I have ever experienced in my life and not in a good way. In fact, it was the most horrific spa experience that I have encountered. Please read on.... My husband was nice enough to buy me a "Groupon" deal for Mother's Day. Last Monday I realized that it was expiring. I called and asked if the deal was still valid and the receptionist who seemed very young and very clueless told me that it was not good on weekend (that includes Friday) but that she would double check as they had a Friday opening. She let me know she would return my call. Nope....so I called back to confirm that it was still okay and the owner said that it was and she would see my on Friday. I went to my appointment with high hopes. They were dashed when the receptionist gave me a flyer to fill out so she could send me coupons but did not ask me anything about my massage preferences or my skin care routine. As I was getting ready in the spa room I heard a long and lengthy conversation about cutting hours and the fact that one of the girls was "walking" if the issues were not resolved. This was not an auspicious beginning. The hand and foot massage was given to me by a young women who barely provided any pressure. However just as I was relaxing the owner came in and screamed "Switch" and my original masseuse was replaced by the owner. She was nice enough in a "I am the owner and I hate Groupons" kind of way but she clearly did not know what she was doing. She put two masks on my face that burned. When I explained that I was on Retin A she told me that it would "only burn for a minute." Finally she took it off and then proceeded to put on another mask that burned as well. She explained, "these masks burn but they work." Really? All I wanted was a relaxing day. The head massage was more like Mary digging into my cranium with her nails. I remember when I was in 5th grade and I contracted lice from my sister's friend. My mother had to dig them out with stinging and burning shampoo and a horrible comb. Now you understand what the head massage felt like. This was proceeded by two painful hours of Mary using some of the tools that professional aestheticians use but not in the right way. Imagine letting your eleven year old drive the family car. This included digging into half of my body as she massaged me. Clearly only part of my body deserved the massage. She also asked super inappropriate questions about my medical conditions. Geez...last I looked I did not scare people in Target. Obviously Mary has not seen me before because she shared that she was an RN and that she had been doing this for a long time. She also tried to sell me 100 face cream...I don't think so. The highlight was when Mary came in after stepping out of the room and I heard her saying, "Hot....hot....hot." About 5 seconds later she threw a hot towel on my back and when I jumped up and screamed she asked, "Is this too hot? Nope...not at all....that is why you were saying that to yourself as you walked into the room. I should have known because earlier during my facial she placed another towel on my face and it was close to burning hot. However my face was already numb because of the mask that "stings but really works." I could go on but why? There is literally 5 more pages of the same. If you go to Mary's expect to pay top dollar for services that my 7 year old could provide (minus the burning masks and the HOT towels as she is not allowed to touch chemicals or the microwave). Had I paid full price the services would have been close to 200 dollars. I left without providing a tip (I have never done that before) and I have called my dermatologist because my face is itching and burning. I should have walked out when she left me in the room alone for 15 minutes or when she was scratching the souls of my feet with her nails (think the lice story earlier). Now I am scratching my own head wondering what an idiot I am as well as my face because it feels like fire ants are on it. Next year, my husband can just get me flowers. No complaints.
http://www.openvoc.eu/poi#coolReviews	1 (xsd:int)
rev:reviewer	Candace

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