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  • Three stars has to be the highest rating I have ever given to a restaurant where I found the food to be nearly inedible, but my wife liked her linguine shrimp, and the restaurant is so popular that I must be missing something. First of all, if you look up "tourist trap" in the dictionary, you will find a picture of Battista's. I speculate (emphasizing the word "speculation" and not "allegation" here) that, in a nod to its alleged mob past, someone is greasing the palms of every cab driver and concierge in town. Whatever they are doing, it is working. The place seems to be mobbed (pardon the pun) every night. (Make a reservation!) People seem to like the complimentary wine, garlic bread, and soup or salad. Personally, I thought they were worth every penny, so to speak. The only exception was the complimentary cappuccino, which was pretty good. I would have ordered a different salad, but the very sparse one-page menu has no other salads, or soups for that matter. Or wine list. You eat and drink what they put in front of you. I ordered the sausage cacciatori, which consisted of a pretty bland sweet Italian sausage link in a bed of some very weird sauce. My guess is that the sauce was mostly green peppers, with a touch of tomato and garlic, run through a blender for ten minutes. Yuck. I also tried the side order of meatballs, which were also bland but at least the sauce tasted more or less like canned tomatoes. Time to start thinking about drive through at McDonald's on the way home. The service was okay, I guess. Kind of slow and kind of disinterested, but the food got to the table. The ambiance was busy, with lots of knick knacks and photos of entertainers on the walls. The prices were not a huge bargain, but were acceptable if you count some of it as going to the complimentary wine. (Here's a secret: If you sit in the bar you can order a version of the full dinner menu without the "complimentary" wine, at a much lower price. And also avoid the wait for a table. They don't trumpet this deal, so you heard it here first.) So, anyway, we won't be going back to Battista's. If you are willing to wait 45 minutes for a table at an Italian restaurant, I would recommend going a couple of miles west on Flamingo Boulevard and eating at Nora's Italian Cuisine. Much better food at comparable prices.
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