The sales lady that insisted on "helping" me today was a total "skin care expert" quack. All I was looking for was a facial cleanser because I'm on a trip and just ran out. The lady first made up some bullshit about how I have "large aging dark spots" like I am some sort of idiot who has never seen a mirror and naturally she has the magic serum that will make it "disappear immediately". She became very insistent on trying to apply to my face. I tell her no thanks, I've already got my makeup on after my 12 step I-am-in-a-fucking-dessert-and-I-am-fucking-prepared morning skin care routine. So what does she do? She starts dabbing this white goo on half of my face while rambling on about beta carotene and "sciences". Mind you, she never once came remotely close to actually explaining anything scientifically; she just kept repeating the word "sciences". What seems like forever goes by and when she felt like she has applied a sufficient amount of her magic liquid that should have made my nonexistent large dark spots disappear, she says to me, "look! See how much better you look already? Can't you see a difference!?" I popped my head into view of the closest mirror and all she did was completely fuck shit up on the half of my face where she put that goop on. I literally look like I am melting on the same side where I am simultaneously suffering hemispatial neglect from a stroke. She smiles and insists that I do in fact look much better and as I try my best to fix up my face without any further involvement from her and run out of there before she brings out the snake oil. On my way out, I couldn't decide if I was just trolled on a game show or she was just the most untactful sales person who desperately needs an eye exam. It's most definitely the latter but I choose the believe the former so I can laugh this horrendous experience off.