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| - The food was delicious - this was the only thing we had to eat all day and we were both on cloud 9 how tasty it was. The ambiance was sexy and we left utterly pleased. Hailing a cab right outside hotel, we immediately went onto our next adventure - RHINO !
Few minutes into it, inside the cab, I began sweating profusely and experiencing this entirely new feeling. " I AM GOING TO SHIT MYSELF RIGHT HERE IN THIS CAB" is what I thought. My husband, back then my fiancé, had a similar look on his face:
"torture, combined with agony and fear that we would defecate profusely over one another".
During the 15-20 minutes of torture: I was getting ready to cry, I was crossing my legs, I was praying to Jesus Christ that it doesn't come out of me right there. At last, we made it to the club and I experienced a new low: I had diarrhea 8 times inside a strip club ! By the end, the bathroom attendant was soooo grossed out, she couldn't even look me in the face. I tipped the bathroom attendant a lot - more than I usually tip strippers, because she became my closest companion and the keeper of my secrets. She heard all the noises she was hearing and just went on organizing stripper perfumes on the bathroom counter. Eventually, it started coming out of both ends.
If you ever think you reach a personal low in life, think of yourself diarrheating inside a filthy strip club bathroom, while the strippers run away and hide in terror.
I never had a food poisoning that bad. My husband neither. At last, we couldn't keep pretending we were enjoying the club, left and went back to the hotel. We made a report with the hotel management the very next morning.
I was alarmed that they " sent someone up" to "take a report" and in reality scout our room for god knows what. They couldn't give a sh*t that we got profusely sick in their sh*tty buffet, and instead were hoping they would find a culprit inside a room - god knows what they were looking for- drugs, or two drunks hung over, perhaps some other illicit subtances. Maybe a scene from a movie. from But instead they found one angry and very sick clinical pharmacist and an even angrier critical care doctor having the worst food poisoning of their life.
After "taking the report" - the management was supposed to get back to us regarding the terrible food poisoning - they never have. Predictably. And so I give praise to the food, but advise you to eat it with caution because who knows what will happen next.
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