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| - Coffee shops are notorious hipster hangouts, but I don't need to tell you that. This is more basic than Starbucks, and should be obvious to even the most amateur hipster watchers. But Sip is home to something so special and unique that it is drawing hipster watchers in from all around the Southwest: the elusive "South Scottsdale Hipster Bro."
While the South Scottsdale Hipster Bro hasn't been officially classified yet in the Before it Was Cool Hipster Almanac, rumors have it that peer review is pending and will likely be complete within the year. An official designation will probably be a boon for business, as it will likely draw even more hipster watchers from farther afield. Sip already has a reputation among Hipster watchers, with the largest documented population of this unique endemic varietal of hipster in the lower 48. At nearly any given moment at least one or two hipster bros will be present - a treat since most Hipster Bro sightings in the wild occur with only a single specimen. Visiting hipster watchers will find this group viewing a treat, as Hipster Bros only produce their unique vocalizations within close vicinity of another Hipster Bro.
What it is about Sip that acts as a draw for Hispter Bros is yet unknown. The decor may be a factor. It is hypothesized that the shabbychic furniture reminds the Hipster Bro of his old frat house, providing him with both comfort and a sense of home, while the vibrant colors and excellent spacing appeal to his sensitive, artistic soul. The mismatched plastic cups may remind him of the cheap plastic cups he still occasionally plays beer pong with, and they also help him hydrate so he can later hit the gym to work off those coffee calories. And while the decor may be partially responsible for the influx of Hipster Bros, Sip's draft selection is also a magnet for HBs looking to smash a few craft brewskies with his bros. Like sugar water to a hummingbird, Sip attracts Hipster Bros with the opportunity to swap beard grooming techniques, order mocchiatos the way their made in Italy, and hit on some fly-ass honies. Clearly they find the combination of all these elements irresistible, and the result is a stunning concentration of the South Scottsdale Hipster Bro.
Come enjoy this off-the-map Hipster watching mecca before the word gets out it gets ruined by the crowds. You'll be delighted to see bro hugs between men with beards and skinny jeans, and nothing beats the thrill of hearing a craft IPA-drinking Hipster Bro talk about taking his vintage 1978 Schwinn over to a girl's house and totally banging her even though she was a 6.
You'll love it if: you want to see the South Scottsdale Hipster Bro in an unspoiled setting
You'll hate it if: you have a phobia of beards and displays of overt, aggressive masculinity
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