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| - What. The. Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck?????!!
I was stone-cold sober last night, I SWEAR. I went to see George Wallace, expecting a middle-of-the-road Vegas standup show. Some laffs, some audience participation, whatever. What do you expect for free tickets, ya know?
What I got was about 60 minutes of a cherubic relic in a pimp suit mumbling, slurring and stumbling through a bunch of dusty one-liners
(sometimes his delivery was so bad, I couldn't understand what he was saying). There were a few jokes in really bad taste, though, about which he was totally unapologetic...so I did laugh at those.
But then, the show got WEIRD AS FUCK!
As one of the other reviewers mentioned, the audience is mostly middle-aged black people. Now, I've seen Madea and Coming to America and all those movies that end with church scenes featuring gospel singers clapping and throwing up their hands and singing "O Happy Day" and shit like that -- I thought it was some bullshit racist Hollywood stereotype.
But I'm here to tell you: at end of his show, on a Wednesday night in Vegas, George Wallace asked all the ministers in the house to stand up -- astonishingly, there were 7 or 8 of them in there that night, so they all got up and passed the mic around, saying their names, where they were from, and what church they preached at:"The First African Episcopalian Tabernacle Church of God in Christ," stuff like that. WTF!!!
Now George Wallace cued some 80s gospel music, and handed the mic around again. This one guy down front started belting away in a majestic baritone, somehow knowing all the words without a problem. Was he a plant? Or do all ministers just know these songs, and happen to frequent the George Wallace show (other reviewers here describe this same thing going down)?
Next, he invited another one of the ministers, this big spiky-haired woman, onstage. He told her if she could sing this next track, and really kill it, he would match all the money people in the audience threw at her. WTF?! He didn't say anything about it going to her church -- I guess she just got to keep the cash.
So he cued up another obscure gospel track, and she took the mic -- and started DOMINATING that song!! I thought for sure she must be a plant -- she'd been sitting in a booth with a bunch of much younger guys who had raised their hands earlier when Wallace asked if anyone was from Detroit, but she said she was from Henderson...plus, they didn't react like friends would when she was pulled up onstage. Definitely seemed plant-y.
But if that's the case, then what a scam!!! Because after she belted a verse or two, people in the audience started getting up and throwing cash at her!!! They came from all over the theater -- the back, sides, front -- and even my friend went up and gave her $5, so I know the money wasn't all fake. People were standing up in the aisles, waving their hands in the air like on those creepy megachurch broadcasts, singing along and praising Jesus. Did I mention this was a Wednesday night in Vegas, and most of them were drinking Mai Tais and shit!!!!! WTF!!!
If this lady was really a plant, she has a pretty sweet gig going there -- she probably made about $100 for her "impromptu" performance, which I assume she repeated the following night...and the following night. George Wallace said he would match the money after the show -- he said, "Come see me, and I'll give you $100." Hmmm.
Now that I think about it...the theater was only about a third full, and as mentioned my friends and I had gotten free tickets, so who knows how many other comps were in there. He's probably not making much money, since he spent a good portion of the show hawking his merch -- he told people over and over to be sure and buy one of his signature "I Be Thinkin'" hats after the show, which were normally $30 but this night only, just for us, he was marking them down to $20. He also pimped his $100 package, which included 2 CDs, 2 DVDs, 2 t-shirts and 2 keychains.
It came off as kinda swap-meetish, and pretty desperate...so that makes me wonder: is he splitting the take with this planted gospel singer???
Either way, even if she was for real -- that's pretty fucking weird, too! I mean, these people were throwing money at her like it was the Spearmint Rhino!!
WEIRD show. I would recommend scoring free tix somewhere, then eating mushrooms 30min before it starts.
And if you do -- be sure to let me know if the same lady gets up and sings! She looked like a fat Fantasia Barrino, with short spiky hair and a toothy smile.
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