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| - Featuring a fine array of machinery and a host of plucky, considerate staff members, Planet Fitness of Rocky River is a mostly stellar gym, particularly at the $10/month price point (not so much when factoring in the $60ish biannual fee--which is the fault of the corporation, not this gym itself, and thus will not be taken into account). Located in an upscale plaza of relatively high-end clothing stores and a Fresh Start, PF is clean, well-lit, and inviting. Parking is limited topside, but there is a fabulous underground garage at your disposal as well. The locker rooms are devoid of that olfactory funk which characterizes lesser gyms. There are an estimated thirty treadmills, ellipticals, bikes, and dozens of other machines scattered throughout the grid in what seems a haphazard fashion, though all are easy to use and exhibit no obvious signs of decay. The patented 'Lunk Alarm' will indeed sound when overzealous bodybuilders slam their weights, but these auditory explosions are fairly infrequent in nature. If there is one criticism to lodge against PF, it would be that the headphone jacks on the treadmills and ellipticals don't yield particularly clear results when synched to the six or eight TVs looming over the gym. If you like your Law & Order static-drenched and crackling like a Laurel and Hardy short, however, you'll enjoy this thoroughly. As a lowly white card member, it is impossible for your reviewer to comment on the water massage tank (ominously housed in a closet of sorts beyond the take-your-chances key rack) and/or the tanning beds, though the latter do sell all manner of flavored sprays and lotions in tiny, colorful tubes. In sum, whether you're a deep squat juggernaut or a runner-in-chief by persuasion, you'll find something to your liking here.
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