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  • Thanks to the Hawt on Yelp Week, which allowed me to sample some choice spas at reduced rates, I booked a couple's massage at Alvea Spa. The experience turned out to be mediocre, and I wouldn't consider going there again. This is what I didn't like about the place: 1. No one told us prior to our visit to bring our bathing suits so that we could use the pool during our stay. I would have taken advantage of this opportunity had someone told me. 2. While no outright discrimination occurred, both my girlfriend and I got the distinct impression that our massage therapists were not comfortable working with a lesbian couple. I felt a strange vibe in the air and didn't say anything, so I found it interesting when my girlfriend later mentioned feeling the same way. 3. I was not impressed with my massage. We booked a Hot Stone massage, which I never had before. The stones themselves were relaxing and a fun treat to a standard massage. The massage itself was forgettable at best. The womyn grazed her forearm back and forth along my back quickly and with little pressure. At other massages, therapists have been easily able to pinpoint the areas of my body that are holding my stress, and they will give more attention to those areas. This womyn, however, seemed more concerned on covering all the different areas in the allotted fifty minutes than she was in actually working on the areas that needed it. To be fair, my girlfriend stated afterward that her massage therapist did a great job. We ended up tipping them both 20% just because I didn't want her therapist to possibly get the lesser gratuity I *wanted* to leave for my therapist. 4. The music was distracting and not relaxing. I also wondered why both of the therapists were explaining the procedure to us; they were talking at the same time, and their comments were overlapping, making it hard to catch everything they were saying to us.
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