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| - Dinner at Andros Restaurant this afternoon was a "Herculean" disaster! I cannot in good conscience recommend this place to any sensible person. I departed this place saddened and nineteen dollars poorer. What is worse, is the fact that I have driven past this place for a while, and have grown more and more excited about it, even expressing to the greeter that I'd "dreamed" of trying it.
The disappointment began with the delivery of the meal. The salad, known as the "Andros Salad", was bland with a standard bagged greens mix with two abused cherry tomatoes and two Kalamata olives, an ENORMOUS slice of cucumber that someone attempted to cut with a dull knife, along with a stamp-sized square of flavorless "Feta" cheese. To coat this "fresh" salad, I discovered the "Greek Vinaigrette", or, "small container of oil." No flavor...I didn't need Cassandra the Seer to tell me how this meal would turn out. Now, the pita bread that I ordered for an additional dollar had some flavor, and was surprisingly warm, the highlight of the meal. For the main course, I ordered the Chicken Souvlaki. Now, the menu asserted that the chicken was "marinated", but in what I'll never know because I could not discern a flavor. So, for fifteen dollars, I received two skewers of "grilled, marinated chicken" on them, with no flavor, and absolutely nothing remarkable other than the level of blandness and the price. This meat was not grilled, but seemed to be baked, and it was certainly not marinated. I salted it twice to give it flavor, even going so far as to put the slice of lemon from my water onto it just to revive it.
Moving on, this meal was described as, "...served over a bed of orzo or rice pilaf & grilled vegetables." Sadly, this was not to be, and it was a "Thermopylae" of a disappointment. Instead of a "bed" of orzo, I was treated to a lukewarm pasta salad reminiscent of what is served at picnics and what can be purchased at Giant Eagle or Shop n'Save as "Greek Pasta Salad." It was lousy. Now, the description claimed it was, "chilled, rice-like pasta in chicken broth with fresh herbs, vegetables, and & feta." If this were true, it'd be a meal fit for Olympus. Instead, I received two table spoons of lukewarm pasta, no vegetables in sight, absolutely lacking in any herbs or feta. The vaunted "grilled vegetables", described as, "delicious vegetables grilled & seasoned", was instead a lukewarm mixture commonly served as a side dish at Eat n'Park, with such delights as green beans, wax beans, some very soggy baby carrots, and broccoli from the days of Leonidas. These were not at all grilled, but rather steamed, but hey, the waitress didn't seem surprised when I commented to her that the vegetables were not grilled but steamed. In fact, she seemed blase about it, as if she had heard this complaint before. Still, nobody came to check on the diner, and instead, the dreadful fifteen dollar disappointment continued.
Closing the meal, the waitress, possibly sensing my lack of enjoyment, proffered me a dessert menu, but since the meal was such a let down, I did not want to grant Mr. Andros any more of my money. No, I merely paid for what I had and left a tip. Oddly, the hostess that greeted me with happiness when I was talking about how excited I was about the meal, was hesitant to even ask me how I enjoyed it. When I told her that it was not too good and lacked any flavor whatsoever, she encouraged me to give them constructive criticism. But then again, whenever I tried to make eye-contact with the two people schmoozing with the tables, I was ignored. I was relegated to a tiny corner table, and was soon barricaded in by a table of two loud families. Note that it was not the kids who were loud but rather the parents, and soon someone who seemed to be an owner and who earlier was telling a guest about how they'd like to keep the business in the family, came over and gushingly greeted this group, telling the "youngin's move to the back." She then had a long conversation about her love of wine coolers, stated some tale about the time she received the carbohydrate count from a beverage company when it was not listed, but nothing to the person sitting at the table clearly not enjoying the meal. So, as I started my Odyssey home, I left hungry, I left unsatisfied, and most of all, I left nineteen dollars short. I will never, ever return here, and I will never, ever recommend this place to anyone, not even Darius the Great.
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