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  • On a typical Friday night, a few friends and I head down to see some of their live entertainment. Specifically the wonderful male nurse-turned-irish-entertainer Donal O'Shaughnessy. We sit and immediately order drinks. For me, it's my go-to Irish drink. Keep your Guinness, make mine a Smithwick's. From there, it's time to eat, and I've got to tell you, I've never had a bad sandwich here. The Pittsburgh Primanti is a tip of the cap to Primanti Bros., of Pittsburgh, except better. The Whiskey Island Burger is heaven, topped with barbecue and bacon. The Potato Skins would have ol' Paddy devouring a plate or two in no time. My face starts to feel warm, so, I order another Smithwick's. My head gets warm, so, I order another Smithwick's. The corners of my mouth turn upward, and my cheeks start to hurt, so, I order another Smithwicks. Only this time, I start to get a little light headed. So, I add a little whiskey to help weigh me down. And then, there's singing and I feel my voice start to get sore from shouting. So, I order another Smithwick's. And then, I order another Smithwick's, so, I order another Smithwick's, and then I order two more. And then to celebrate the delivery of my Smithwick's, I order a water, an aspirin and a cab. And then I wake up in bed with a fog settling over my brain, a dull ache in my face and stomach and my cheeks sore. There's a feeling of euphoric bliss that's come over me that I'm not used to. There's a slight, dull ache in my forehead and cheeks, and I'm leafing through medical journals wondering why. Now, I've drank Smithwick's before, no problem. I've eaten fantastic Bacon Barbecue Cheeseburgers before, no sweat. I've glugged whiskey, no issue, sang songs while drunk, cursed like a sailor, danced like an idiot, each with no problem. My official diagnosis: I am allergic to the Flat Iron Cafe. But, don't worry about me, friends. Medical science has the tools and technology to help keep this allergy under control: I just switch to Guinness halfway through the night and I'm good to go!
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