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  • So this evening, the wife wants Korean for her birthday dinner, just some takeout, y'know, have some be-bim-bap in our own backyard while contemplating the trees to the sound of dying locusts. So the kid (age 14) and I go to The Green Pepper and I send him in with some cash and wait in the car. He comes out ten minutes later, empty handed. "Why the delay?" "The guy said this is a fake twenty dollar bill," my son told me. He tossed me the bill (it was the old kind, from the 1980s). "Really? Did he use a pen on it?" "No," said my son. "He said it was 'the fakest twenty dollar bill he ever saw' and said he didn't have a pen. Then he said 'I can't take it, it's fake. Sorry dude.' I just stared at him." "What did this jackass look like?" "Five foot four, looked like a weasel." "Not Korean?" "No. Caucasian. He also couldn't figure out what key to use in the cash register. And then said when he was handing me change from the twenty, 'you gonna give me a tip?' -- which I thought was really weird." "What a jerk. Probably thought it was fun, yanking the wires of a 14 year old." On the other hand, the food is good. Each dish a few more dollars than the other Korean place we normally go to that's closed on Sundays. And the cicadas joined together in a symphony of lust and mortality as we dined under the stars.
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