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| - This is a conditional four stars. I would really like to give it three, but the food is pretty darn good. There are some problems, though. One thing is that Hyde Park (we have been there numerous times, being captive because my parents like it) does a lot of business dinners and medical-rep business. Is this bad, you may ask? Not if you're a business traveler or a medical representative! They have separate meeting/dining rooms, and the decor is very steakhousy-corporate: dark wood, booths, old-timey pictures, etc. If you want to go out for an every-day dinner, however, I would not just drop into Hyde Park for a "bite". Because? They won't allow it. First off (this has happened every time) they escort you to the WORST table in the house (we always go very early). Example: right next to the bathrooms or the service station, even though the entire place is empty. Last night I just said "you know, I hate to say this, but this is the worst table possible, and I am not a table whore, but come on!" The hostess gave us a blank Valley-Girl look which meant "HUH?". She took us to another table immediately. Guess who got that awful table? The next table that was seated. They didn't know enough to ask for a different table. This is a technique that I have seen over and over again around the world, and it's ugly. Why seat a 5:30 table at a dismal spot when you know they're going to be gone by prime time? The next thing that happens is the "specials". Want a $70 lobster tail? A la carte? Then you're in the right place! Who eats a 20 oz. lobster tail? I'll tell you who: their core market, the business people who are in there raping their company's expense accounts and the doctors taking advantage of the drug rep's expense accounts. After we were seated, the two tables of eight next to us were seated. 16 men, seemed like nice guys, already had had a couple of huge martinis at the bar, all lubricated and having a ball. Which is fine. The noise level in the room went up 400% immediately. Each table ordered the $150 raw bar double decker platter (featuring a whole lobster, crab claws, oysters, mussels, shrimp, and so on...it looked delicious!). I listened to their subsequent orders and they proceeded to order huge salads, crab cakes, 24 oz. steaks with extra toppings and $$ added sauces, more drinks, side dishes, and so on. I don't know where they put all this food. Yes, the food is very expertly prepared, and it's classic steakhouse fare. But the portions are insane. My mother had a "side salad" of field greens with goat cheese and caramelized nuts. Delightful, but about four cups portion size. Dinner size. She didn't realize it was going to be so huge, so she also ordered a Kobe beef burger. Also humongous, and with a mound of french fries. She was able to eat about two bites of the burger. I ordered the beef carpaccio appetizer as an entree. The waiter was NOT HAPPY that it was all I ordered. They have a very aggressive selling style there, and if you don't order up, they have no problem letting you know through their body language and other "tells" that you're just NOT GOOD ENOUGH. When my carpaccio came, I could only eat a third of it. It was delicious, but it's such a waste of food to put so much on an appetizer portion. A mound of salad, two huge crispy bread slices, and the beef. My huband ordered the tomato and onion salad and lamb chops. There were four double chops, HUGE, (and delicious, and perfectly cooked) and a mountain of onion rings. Once again, expertly and beautifully prepared. He ate one lamb chop. He was already full from the mound of tomato and onion with bleu cheese. Here is our problem: we don't want leftovers. We eat dinner (and usually lunch) out every single day. What are we going to do with all of this extra food? We don't mind paying for great food. Why can't there be smaller portions? The price is NOT a problem. It's the portion size. The portion size is why we will NEVER go to the Cheesecake Factory, for instance, ever again. We can't be the only people in the world who don't want a 5,000 calorie dinner. People, rise up! (If you can, after that 5,000 calorie dinner, that is). Rise up and ask for smaller portions, so that you CAN order a soup, a salad, an appetizer, an entree, and so on. These days, appetizers are even larger than entrees used to be. It must stop. That being said, the quality of the food at Hyde Park is excellent. But we can't go there. It's just too much food, and their sales techniques are much too aggressive. It's too bad we can't go there, but we can't.
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