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  • It doesn't really feel fair to give Amazing Jake's 4 stars, because there are really two experiences going on within those walls. You've got the culinary struggle, and then the action from all the games/rides. Based on food alone, they'd get a generous 2 stars, with the only saving grace being their limited salad bar. All of the other pabulum aint fab-u-lum. They should could call it "ween cuisine", cuz all it takes is one time Cuz, and you wont be back no mowww (what you say!). Mushroom fettuccine sounds delightful, until you get a punch from whatever that whacky-ass oyster essence is. The pizza was a train wreck... a train wreck with fatalities... that spilled like 1000 gallons of ammonia, which threatens to asphyxiate the nearest small town. Man, go to Cici's buffet. See what those playas bring to the table for $5, and then try to replicate. Better yet, take $100 from the till and hit the nearest Little Caesars. Daaaang! The dessert case proudly boasts "Freshly Baked"... what you don't know, is what month it was freshly baked, cuz Money, it wadn't today. And I know the difference between ice cream, frozen yogurt, and frickin ice milk. Ya hoodwinked me, G! But in the eyes of a 4yo, this place is almost as fun as Disneyland. She was sooo excited to go on all of the rides, so if you've got a little adrenaline junkie too, the mini coaster will hold the pinnacle of thrills. And one word of advice. When you're leaving, and you see that free photo kiosk hanging on the wall, where you can email the photo to yourself... the touch screen is way out of calibration. Check the email address twice before you hit send. Even after checking it, you still may not get your portrait sent to you... and that makes daddy sad.
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