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| - If you're looking for some good beer, decent eats, spotty service and just the right amount of sleaze, this is your joint right here.
I must admit that there are plenty of great restaurants in the St. Lawrence Market area that I could (and should) be visiting, but my friends and I have instead made this one of our preferred destinations. For a Cara-owned operation, this Bier Markt is on the spectrum of what I like to call a "premium dive bar".
The location itself is solid, just a couple minutes walk from Union and nestled in-between a mix of high and low end joints like a Keg, a Tilted Kilt and a bunch of one-off bistros.
Come in here and you'll certainly be entertained by the... flora and fauna. I'm still trying to figure out if the waitresses are trying to compete with some of these other establishments after hours or this is really what their dress code is, because they rock some of the tightest clothing I've ever seen. You certainly won't be at a loss for entertainment if the conversation isn't up to snuff.
The food is forgettable, by and large. I showed up here for birthday drinks with friends and we settled on apps (onion rings and fries). I understand there are build-it-yourself charcuterie boards you can buy, but based on what I ordered the last time I was here last time (the fish and chips) and this experience, the overall result is just ho-hum. The onion rings in particular were extremely greasy and I found myself giving up and not wanting to clog my arteries any further after a couple bites.
I also ended up going for a Cider Mojito (which was referred to in the past as a "Swedish Mojito", if one of the bar's past menus is anything to go by), which had Sommersby, strawberry coulis and mint. You can always tell when a restaurant's specialty drinks are up to snuff if they can make a good mojito - and this one delivered. The only quibble I have is that it was very clear that they pulled out frozen fruit to put in this -- not so much a problem if you're not planning to consume said fruit, but it was for me.
The biggest problem, and the one that's most mentioned, is the service. Some of the wonkiest variations in attentiveness I've seen in a while. One table away, a waitress attempted to cram 9(!) people into a 4-person booth, with three of them standing awkwardly in the aisle as servers rushed by until someone finally told them there was another table available. Our server was a woman who was clearly up to her limit and sporting an attitude, yet she oscillated from passive-aggressiveness to somehow remembering my drink order an hour after I called it in, and it wasn't even that busy.
Another waitress brought me a Diet Pepsi (hey, shut up, I'm trying to diet) and laughed at me behind my back! What's up with that? Maybe she should check out her own butterface before she makes a crack at a customer who tipped her well last time.
There's some good stuff to like here. Bier Markt's a solid spot to hang out with friends and there could be some good menu items, but a decent neighborhood bar is about all it is.
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