| rev:text
| - Went here during the Tremont Art Walk last Friday for a glass of wine and a quick little something to eat. Turns out our "quick little something to eat" would turn into an hour and a half of my life that I will never get back.
You would think being a "Martini and Wine Bar" the waiters would at least know the difference between their Cabs and Merlots... well, they don't. In fact, I was told by my waiter that "oh I don't know anything about those wines, and we probably don't even have the ones on the menu." Seriously?! Makes sense though, since their menus were sticky gross plastic things that you would get at your local greasy spoon breakfast diner... probably haven't even touched the things in about 5 years. And the music! Journey and ACDC blasting in a restaurant posing as a upscale dining experience. What a joke. Reminded me of my college days back on campus... I was just waiting for karaoke to start up any minute!
After waiting for 15 minutes to put our drink order in, I asked our waiter for a recommendation for a very dry, earthy red (since I couldn't see for myself on the menu)... and he ended up giving me the sweetest red he probably could find with a deep butterscotch undertone. Gross. Asked for the quail dish for a small plate. Oh guess what - they're out of that. Okay then.. I will take the Hanger Steak - medium rare, with the Parmesan Risotto as the side. Risotto is supposed to be light and filling... it's so easy to screw up while cooking and after my experience with the waiter and the wine, I was scared to death after I put my order in. I was rightfully nervous. What I got back was a VERY rare Hanger Steak with risotto that was completely inedible. It was seriously a slop of overly cheesy-greasy-crusted with a half-inch of baked cheese crap. Think of the greasiest hash browns you've ever had.. deep fry them... then mix a ton of greasy cheese into it and slap a ton more cheese on top. That was the risotto I was expected to eat. And parmesan is naturally salty so the risotto was also overly seasoned! I wont' even get into all the details over the cheese plate we ordered. It was mostly stale bread and crackers plus the same portions that 2 oz mouse would eat. We literally starting laughing at the ratio of cheese to stale crackers on our plate! The cheese wasn't even existent, and the stuff that was there was overpowered by the gigantic pile of roasted garlic on the plate. What a mess!
We waited over 30 minutes for our check, and I finally had to get up to go to the bar and ask for it personally. Our waiter saw me retrieve my own check and thanked the bartender for "covering that for him," rather than apologize to me for his worst service ever. That's okay - I saw that the waiter was in a deep bro-ish conversation with the buxom blonde in the corner. No worries, I won't interrupt your swagg, bro.
My husband and I will not be returning to this place. Ever. I prefer my wine and martini bars to know a damn thing or two about their wines, and their food to be at least edible. We're sticking to Market Ave Wine Bar from now on.
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