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| - We made our trip to Smoky's on the recommendation of one of the nice staff at our hotel, who swore that this is where her family has eaten good steak for generations. Who am I to question the dining habits of Midwesterners? I found a description of the place in one of the Madison free magazines designed for tourists, which focused on independent restaurants, and it sounded like a fun dive, so we went.
Now, a word of advice. Don't go out to dinner on a game day in the state capital when the Badgers have beaten Michigan State to a place that has been around since the Eisenhower administration, where grandfathers who are WU alums bring their grandkids after the game. Don't do it. This isn't a small place, but it was beyond packed when we got there, and we had to wait for close to an hour. Football photos and tacky christmas lights, whorehouse-red lighting and red naugahyde covering most surfaces might give you an idea of the ambience, described in the magazine I referred to above as "delightfully tacky". I don't know how delightful it was, but it was tacky. And crowded. And loud. And so we waited.
We ordered drinks at the bar to while away the time. Peter ordered a local microbrew, and I was served the best Bloody Mary I ever had in my life, which comes standard with a small PBR chaser. Both drinks came to $8.50, which, to my NYC perspective, made it a hell of a deal. Get a load of what garnishes went into my drink:
One celery stalk
Two huge pimiento stuffed green olives
Two pickled asparagus spears
Three pickled string beans
One garlic pickle spear
Three pickled Brussel Sprouts
Garnishes notwithstanding, it was really delicious. The garnishes just made it more so.
As for the rest of the meal, there were highs and lows, heavier on the lows, and glimmers of what could indicate a good meal on a less busy day. All tables get a relish tray of radishes, carrot sticks and scallions. Not really sure why the scallions were there. The breadbasket was horrible. There were small melba toasts in it, thankfully, but other than being warm, the bread itself had zero to recommend it, other than being a place to put butter. Peter ordered a decent shrimp cocktail for $10.
Entrees come with salad, soup and a veg or potato. We both ordered the special of the day, prime rib, with Peter opting for the King cut ($28) and me opting for the Queen ($22). I love prime rib, and was looking forward to it. Peter also ordered sides of sauteed onions and mushrooms ($3 each).
The salad was fair, fresh, and not bad, but the dressings offered were pretty sweet and not very tasty. The signature dressing is French with Roquefort in it. DON'T try it. I did, and the salad went right back. The soup of the day was cream of chicken. Normally, that sets the alarm bells off in my head, but instead of a gluey starchy gloppy sludge, I got a well-balanced, soupy soup with delicious chunks of tender chicken and a chickeny base. The signature potato is a hash brown loaf of sorts which has a nice crispy outside but it basically bland and underseasoned shredded frozen potato underneath. Not terrible, but not worth eating.
Now...for the prime rib. We ordered ours medium rare. The first dishes to come out looked gray. When we cut into ours, there was no pink apparent. One bite and we sent them back. Peter's second piece of meat was textbook medium rare, and the single largest piece of beef I have ever seen served to one person. He said it was delicious. Mine, on the other had, was virtually raw, full of fat and gristle, and was inedible. Sent it back again. The third time out, I was so annoyed that when I tried to cut into it and could not get my serrated steak knife through it, I gave up. That was three steaks I had been served, and not one was as ordered or edible. I'm not that demanding--I would have settled for an overcooked steak at that point, but it was not to be. As it was, the steak Peter had was very good, and on that note, I am giving Smoky's two stars. Several tables around us were also sending back meat, so I am assuming the kitchen was simply overwhelmed by the volume, although it isn't like this is the first football game day ever to come to Madison.
Our server was excellent and patient, and the soup and cocktail both indicated that this might indeed be a serviceable restaurant when they have time to prepare the food properly. I don't know when I'll be in Madison again, but if I did go back and was taken to Smoky's, I will make sure not to go on a Saturday during football season.
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