About: http://data.yelp.com/Review/id/MKkn-Ze9Y79EHNxaUvMDSw     Goto   Sponge   NotDistinct   Permalink

An Entity of Type : rev:Review, within Data Space : foodie-cloud.org, foodie-cloud.org associated with source document(s)

AttributesValues
type
dateCreated
itemReviewed
http://www.openvoc.eu/poi#funnyReviews
rev:rating
http://www.openvoc.eu/poi#usefulReviews
rev:text
  • I had just left the Talisman Centre after pumping a shitload of iron, and stumbled across Bensonhurst. I thought to myself, "This looks like a great place to ruin my workout", so I sauntered in with a confident swagger and parked my ass at the bar. The barkeep told me about the nightly special, which was any forno pizza and a pint for $15 (this was a Monday night). Since I was going to order a pint of ice-cold brewskarino anyway, I figured I'd have to be a ritard (yes, I spelled that Allan-from-The-Hangover style) to pass up an offer like that! I perused the menu while I enjoyed a frosty glass of Brooklyn IPA, which the barkeep had recommended...good call! It was a light amber colour, tasted slightly but pleasantly bitter and went down easy (like your sister...hey-oh!) I settled on the Cali Smoke Show, which is topped with double-smoked pancetta, provolone, mozzarella, rosemary, and finished with a drizzle of olive oil. The verdict?: OH! EM! EFF! GEE! This was the tastiest 'za that I've EVER had the pleasure of experiencing! Each and every bite was like my mouth was spontaneously having multiple, quivering orgasms. Mouthgasms? Yeah, I'll call them mouthgasms. I had planned to eat a couple slices and pack the rest up, but it was so delicious that I stuffed the entire goddamn pie into my filthy tit-licker. Most people use manners when they eat in public, but I didn't give a fuck...I tore into it like a starving dog would tear into a bag of garbage. I'm pretty sure I even let loose a few gleeful grunts; again, zero fucks were given. I haven't been that happy since I received my fourth blowjob! (The first three were kinda shitty). I ordered another pint and slurped it down, as I had clearly lost any sense of dignity at this point. I chatted with the friendly barkeep, Brian, who also happens to be the owner of the joint. He's a really nice guy and seems to have an acute sense of business acumen. Also, he mentioned that they are adding some new items to the menu really soon, including some healthy choices (salads and such). Bottom line, this place is epically awesome. Bring your next blind date here; if she's hot, she'll be impressed, and if she's fat, then at least you can enjoy a consolation mouthgasm!
http://www.openvoc.eu/poi#coolReviews
rev:reviewer
Faceted Search & Find service v1.16.115 as of Sep 26 2023


Alternative Linked Data Documents: ODE     Content Formats:   [cxml] [csv]     RDF   [text] [turtle] [ld+json] [rdf+json] [rdf+xml]     ODATA   [atom+xml] [odata+json]     Microdata   [microdata+json] [html]    About   
This material is Open Knowledge   W3C Semantic Web Technology [RDF Data] Valid XHTML + RDFa
OpenLink Virtuoso version 07.20.3238 as of Sep 26 2023, on Linux (x86_64-generic_glibc25-linux-gnu), Single-Server Edition (252 GB total memory, 138 GB memory in use)
Data on this page belongs to its respective rights holders.
Virtuoso Faceted Browser Copyright © 2009-2026 OpenLink Software