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| - I had the Yelp Review of the Day when I wrote about my romantic feelings and Batch. It was great because it was so terrible, but terribly true. When I realized that relationships established by Batch bread were not as hunky dory as I thought, I updated my review to inform my loyal readership. Yelp was not amused. I thought they removed my review because bringing baguettes to bed was too risque for the internet, but then I realized all they wanted me to do was write more. Donc, nous allons écrire plus de déchets.
Have you ever wanted to be French? Like beret wearing, cigarette smoking, absinthe drinking, Royale With Cheese eating French French? Well, Batch doesn't let you do any of that. I swear, they will slap a beret off your head and smile. But waking up with the sun and buying a hot baguette? Yes. You can do that.
And you can't do that anywhere else that matters.
You can get croissants and cookies and monkey bread (these could be described as The Heat), but the baguettes are special. They aren't sweet or adulterated in any way like the ham and gruyere croissants (which are also delicious). The baguettes come unbiased. They are beautiful. They are pure.
Also, boo let me bring the baguette to bed when I also brought some cheese. So, like, all is good and shit.
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