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| - The start of our gastronomic experience kicked off in a way you'd hope in all top quality restaurants: being screamed at by the welcoming host the moment you step in the door. After much confusion we realised he was just trying to tell us that the $11.99 "all you can eat" offer had finished for the day and was now $14. Just in case we couldn't quite get this, he helpfully "wrote" the number 14 on his hand with his finger, about 14 times, just to make sure the message was clear. Well, we didn't even want to take the "all you can eat" offer, but thanks anyway for making sure the price was imprinted in my brain until the day I die.
Being determined diners (read: hungry), this wasn't enough to deter us, so we decided to give it a go. We opted for the $8.99 lunch special, which consisted of a choice of meal (hot or sushi), soup, salad and a drink.
We waited quite a long time for the soup and salad to come, so in the meantime we took in the surroundings, which consisted of: 1. Other diners waiting endlessly for their meal, 2. Cheery Christmas lights (in October), and 3. A waiter who looked about 12 years old, moping around the place but not seeming to be really doing anything.
Eventually we got the soup and salad, well I say salad - it was iceberg lettuce in a bowl with dressing poured over it. Despite the simplicity, it was actually rather refreshing and the miso soup was not too bad either. We considered this to be a good start and decided the food here was probably pretty acceptable.
WE COULDN'T HAVE BEEN FURTHER FROM THE TRUTH. In fact, the dressing-drizzled iceberg turned out to be the best thing on the menu.
Here are a few tips if you decide to come here:
1. Bring your own rice. What they use appears to be cooked several days earlier and recycled probably with the help of the microwave (see below).
2. Hell, bring your own sushi. To find out why, read on.
3. Don't order the sushi with the "grilled" fillings. Unless you want to watch the chef warm it up in the microwave (see above), and you enjoy food eating food that is so dry you may as well have ordered a large glass of Sahara.
4. Forget about the drink. If you're lucky they'll bring it just as you're finishing the meal. If not, just grab it on your way out.
As for the service, the restaurant wasn't busy (it was 3pm on a Sunday), yet there were several "waiters", none of which seemed to have the first clue what was going on.
Helpfully, when we'd finished the meal, the waiter brought us the "all you can eat" menu (even though we didn't take that offer - even though I did still remember the price), which was either because a) we still looked hungry, or b) he thought we hadn't had enough punishment. And when we paid the bill, the guy taking the payment had a distinct "sorry to have ruined your afternoon, I understand you're probably not going to tip us" look on his face.
In summary, don't eat here unless you had your tastebuds extracted at an early age or you consider good service in a restaurant "overrated".
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