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| - Yelp, I cannot think of the words necessary to express my disappointment. This was not only the worst seafood I have eaten in my life, but by far the worst Mexican food as well. What are you people smoking?
We started with a few beers, can't screw that one up. I ordered an appetizer that was completely not as described but I should have known better since it was in the cold section of the appetizers. It sure didn't say raw oysters, raw shrimp, octopus, and thawed shrimp in a crappy broth. All for $15? As if there wasn't enough lack of texture with those ingredients, they throw avocado on top. Yeah, that will round out the dish. I am not even completely factoring that into the rating because I should have paid more attention to it being cold.
For my meal I got Marlin Machaca. What kind of seafood joint serves you shredded fish? Is it marlin or Tuna? Why the hell would I want my fish shredded? On top of that the flavors were just bad. It was either canned, or just not fresh. How can you call this place a seafood establishment when they rape the fish so badly? It came with refried beans, white rice with frozen peas and carrots, and a pile of raw iceberg lettuce. Why are they adding frozen veggies to the rice? It doesn't bring me comfort to know they aren't cooking anything fresh. And why the nasty white iceberg in clumps? The beans were good and they gave us tortillas so I spent the meal making little tacos and seeing which hot sauce covered up the poor flavors the best.
The other victim ordered the "fish". How much less information can they provide. It was a choice between sea bass or Tilapia. Since Tilapia is a FRESHWATER fish, they lose points and really expose themselves as a fraud. Hers was much better than mine, but nothing worthy of taking it home leftovers or ever returning.
Bill totaled out to $50+!! For Mexican food, and terrible Mexican food at that! Food was awful, prices were outrageous, it was in the cesspool that is Guadalupe, how much worse can it get?
I should have listened to my inner voice that said nothing good happens in Guadalupe. It is an unbelievable little place. The instant you cross over from Tempe to the Guad the road turns to crap with potholes and bumps everywhere. Businesses vanish, and homes are replaced with shacks. Minimal street lights and overall maintenance and infrastructure make you feel like 2012 has already arrived. The best part of our journey was driving away, seemingly crossing an imaginary line of civilization and being back in Tempe at AZ Mills Mall.
Not sure what the expectations are for the other reviewers, but I expect fresh food from the sea. Much of what we ate was probably out of a can like the octopus, oysters, and the marlin. The shrimp were most likely frozen and/or precooked.
Saturday night, there was one couple eating there, and a bunch of drunks outside playing the guitar. That says more about this place than the unexplainable positive reviews on here. I will never be able to look at Yelp reviews the same way again...
... The one positive I take from this experience is that I saw a hot dog cart and a taco cart as I left the Guad. I may have to hit up the taco cart in the future.
(EDIT: I wonder why the other bad review for this place has been hidden. I should have weighed his opinion more heavily, would have saved me a bad experience and some cash)
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