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| - Every now and then you need to throw caution to the wind and do something rash like visit an Outback Steakhouse for lunch. Partially brainwashed by an endless stream of commercials during the Outback Bowl, partially suckered in by an offer of free coconut shrimp, I paid my first visit to this Aussie-themed chain for the first time in over a decade. Expecting a flood of ravenous fellow Badger fans hoping to score the same coconut shrimp deal, I arrived at the restaurant ten minutes after they opened and grabbed a booth by the large U-shaped bar within four minutes of arriving. The host seemed disinterested at best, barely making eye contact and grunting out a "follow me" as he trudged to my table.
The bar area features three, muted flat screen TVs, either showing the SportsCenter or college bowl games. Physically, the restaurant is in good condition, with my booth showing little wear and tear. However, the black ceiling panels, the dim lighting and the partially drawn shades gave the bar area a slightly gloomy feel, more reminiscent of a trip to the mines of Moria than a visit to the Outback.
Once seated, the pace of the meal slowed to a glacial crawl as the hoard of coconut shrimp-craving diners poured through the front door. Thirty minutes after open, the hungry masses had occupied every table and bar seat. That created a service bottleneck, as management unwisely decided that a single bartender could manage the both the bar during a busy lunch service and all the diners in the bar area (easily 30 people). As a result, it took almost ten minutes for my harried server to make his way to my table. No greeting, no explanation of the day's specials, just a brusque "do you want anything to drink?" Watching the bar area fill to capacity, I elected to pass on a drink order and instead placed an order of the coconut shrimp and the Alice Springs Chicken Quesadilla (grilled chicken breast, sautéed mushrooms, bacon, melted jack and cheddar cheeses).
Twenty minutes later, my server does a drive-by delivery of the meal, literally dropping the plates on the table without a word, ignoring the empty water glass.
As for the food, the cheese quesadillas passed the eye test with just the right amount of browning, which gave each bite a little crunch. The combination of flavors worked for me and the cook did an adequate job of evenly mixing the filling so I got all the ingredients in each bite. Nothing earth shattering, but I'd order it again should I unwisely decide to brave a visit to Outback in the future.
As for the coconut shrimp, lukewarm is not a good serving temperature. I would have sent it back, but alas, no check-in by the server to see how I'm enjoying my meal. While I enjoyed the crunchy texture of the batter, the shrimp was chewy and waaaaaaaay too sweet. The "Creole" dipping sauce tasted like Smuckers orange marmalade with absolutely no heat. As a free dish, I could tolerate the multitude of flaws, but I'd be upset if I had to pay $9.29 for this train wreck of an appetizer.
Twenty minutes after I received my food, I almost needed to tackle my server as he sped by in order to request my check. Five minutes later, he dropped the check off at my table, I paid cash to cover my tab and sped out the door, again ignored by the disinterested host. While I am thankful that Outback cured me of my coconut shrimp addiction, the absolute lack of hospitality and mediocre food will keep me away at least for another ten years.
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