| rev:text
| - "Don't listen to a word I say
"Hey!
"The screams all sound the same
"Hey!"
"Though the truth may vary
"This ship will carry our bodies safe to shore"
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In A Sentence
Do you seek the absolute most expensive petrol in the valley aside from the one station adjacent to Sixt Rent A Car® on Warm Springs/Gillespie? (You've come to the right place.)
Quick Review
+ They carry Thrifty Ice Cream®.
- That Thrifty Ice Cream will cost you more than a comparable amount of same-brand ice cream with the two warm cookies at Sweet Addiction®.
- The petrol -- unleaded regular -- costs as much as the premium at other locations.
Employee of Excellence
+ N/A. Perhaps the guy (or gal) who drives this flammable liquid across state lines while staying awake long enough to avoid crashing into a school bus full of children. He's the real MVP.
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Question:
Do you seek the absolute most expensive petrol in the valley aside from the one station adjacent to Sixt Rental on Warm Springs/Gillespie?
Answer:
Then you have come to the right place here at Texaco Short Line Express Market® in Centennial.
Question:
Do you seek to pay more than 3.50$ USD for less than one true scoop of Thrifty Ice Cream?
Answer:
Then you have come to the right place ....
Observations since my final patronage
+ There is a station just a couple of blocks north on the West side of Durango that provides Petrol at a much lower cost. I won't name it since you know what it is: it rhythms with NARCO.
+ It's like stepping through a wormhole and landing back in the Dumbya years where petrol was forcing people to trade in their Durango®s for Toyota Camry®s and to pull the AAA scam* once a month.
(*Claim running out of gas; get roadside assistance to deliver one whopping liquid gallon of petrol to your location.)
+ I wish there were a sports book in the market so I can wager on the sports games that transpired in the past. It would make up for the overcharge on the fuel and turn me into a real life Biff. (Who wouldn't want to be Biff?)
Firsthand experiences explained in a step-by-step guide for the worthless HQ idiot reading this: step 1. I drive to the business. (I drove there.) Step 2: I open the door of the motor vehicle and step out and shut the door behind me after popping the fuel door. Step 3: I looked at the pump number. Step 4: I began walking towards the doors of the business. Step 5: I returned to the vehicle because I forgot the pump number and need to ensure I don't pay into the wrong pump. Step 6: Once again I walk towards the doors of the business. Step 7: The automatic doors -- like magic -- open for me as if I were Prince Harry, also a combat veteran like me.
Step 8: I wait for the attendant to return from wherever he is.
Step 9: I repeat aloud the number that I have been saying to myself repeatedly and hand him the Jackson. (They really should put a woman on that denomination.)
Step 10: I say thank you.
Step 11: I look at the ice cream on my way out.
Step 12: I reach the motor vehicle, remove the pump, select the grade, unscrew the cap, engage the automatic draw after inserting the nozzle into the female part.
Step 13: I open the door and get inside the motor vehicle before shutting the door behind me. (There must be a reason that Oregon and New Jersey, respectively, bar civilians from pumping their own fuel.)
Step 14: I listen to KNPR, check-in on my Yelp mobile application, think about Mark Wahlberg's firefighter character in I Heart Huckabees, et. cetera.
Step 15: I hear the click of the nozzle disengaging, open the door, step out, pull the nozzle slightly out while still leaving the tip in, shake off the nozzle vigorously, place the ....
I am exhausted of the firsthand experiences. You get the point.
Final Word
Don't come here unless you enjoy burning money unnecessarily*.
(*As opposed to necessarily.)
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Tourists
None here: it's far from the strip.
Kids
Not good for 'em.
Dogs
Leave them at home unless they are service-providing*.
(*Don't you dare leave them in the car!)
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Rating: Two-stars, "Meh. I've experienced better."
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