Today I spent 30 minutes on the phone typing 1 for the next menu and the next one and the next one, before I got a live person. Once I finally did, I asked how much office visits generally run, and the woman said she doesn't know because she only handles appointments at that office. She asked where I lived to find the closest office near me, and said the Southeast one was closest. Fine. She puts me on hold for another 5 or 6 minutes, comes back and tells me that the first available appointment is on November 4th. I said "I could be dead by then." I asked her if she could refer me to a place I could just go to today. She said she only knew about Southwest. I said, "So when you get sick you wait a month an a half to get treated too?" She explained how that's because I'm a new patient. So apparently it's only the new patients they let die. The ones who've already given them money they treat more quickly. Awesome.
I ended up going to UMC Sunset Quick Care...which was AWESOME.
My suggestion: Take your business and your hacking cough to UMC Sunset, where they actually care about you and take care of you at the time that you need it.