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| - I'm a strip club wallflower. My first visit to a strip club was when I was 30... and at that time, I was dragged there by a friend because I had just gotten out of a long relationship and was bummed out. I wouldn't sit close to the stage and I refused lap dances. It's not that I don't like boobs in my face or that I'm opposed to nakedness or that I'm too prude to appreciate the porn industry in general... it's just that I simply never went. Then at some point, it just became more about the fact that I hadn't ever gone and I could say "I've never been to a strip club" that kept me away.
I went here a few weeks ago with a friend of mine who is also a strip club wallflower... by this, I mean we go and don't really know how to have a good time. We order the minimum number of drinks, we don't really get many dances if any and when we do, we feel awkward about it. Meanwhile, other guys go and have a table full of beers, know the strippers by name, have at least three of them hanging at their table sitting on their lap chatting and they're all laughing and having a party.
I went to a big strip club in Vegas once with my girlfriend and we had a pretty good time - perhaps not as good a time as Kid Rock did, but that was as close as I had come to letting loose or whatever. Anyway, I'm capable of going to a strip club and having a good time, but I'll just say it's normally not my thing. Typically, the girls are what make or break a club - if there aren't any girls there at least as attractive as the girl I'm currently boning on a regular basis, what's the point?
Walking in to Centerfolds was pretty interesting - I had heard this was one of the best clubs in the valley and I was ready to be disappointed after such a long drive thinking "there's no way this will be worth the trip." Boy, was I wrong... It's the typical setup - black lights, ugly carpet, bad DJ, main stage, lap-dance conducive seating, and exposed naked boobs. On stage was this blur of a girl holding on to this handle on the ceiling and spinning from it at 1000 RPM. Pretty amazing.
We walk through the club to some seats in the back and we pass a 6'5" (add 5 or so inches for the heels) man-looking woman - I predicted her stage song would be Marylin Manson... I was correct. When the girl on stage stopped spinning, I could see she was like 40 years old. Fine... the rest of the girls in the club seemed to be plain and forgettable for the most part. We had these two mildly overweight cheesy 80s blonds that kept coming up to us asking if we wanted a dance... "Look, no means no... and it means no for the rest of the night... unless you somehow get hot."
In the bathroom, there was a television showing what looked like either a live feed or a recording of the VIP lounge shot in night vision mode and it showed some pretty raunchy (and illegal) stuff going on. I was talked into a dance from this girl who proceeded to give me the most boring dance I've ever had. I hated it so much, I made my friend have one as well. We like to do that to each other - when we get a shitty dance, we make the other person have a go. I don't know why.
We were fortunate enough to witness a bachelor party guy get pulled up on stage and get practically raped by three of the veteran girls. They gave him an atomic wedgie and took his shirt off and got him on all fours and beat him with his own belt. That was the highlight watching him get tortured - didn't look like much fun to me, but then I'm a wallflower and I don't know how to have fun.
There was one girl here who was absolutely gorgeous - she should've been a model or something. She gave the most boring looking lapdances I've ever seen to the table in front of us... she spent half the time texting her friend while on this guy's lap. I guess when you're that hot you don't have to try. Besides that, the best looking girls were serving the drinks rather than dancing (as is always the case).
Overall, I'd say this place is OK... Best stage dances I've seen in AZ, 10 dollar lap dances, plenty of room, and there seems to be a pretty good dancer to customer ratio. A strip club is only as good as the girls who work there, and aside from the few lapdance examples I gave you, it seems like the rest of the girls give pretty 'good' ones - bang for the buck if you know what I mean.
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