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  • My husband and I are vegetarians, and make a point of eating at local veg establishments when we travel. I was very excited when I saw the website for Green...it really looked intriguing. We've been fortunate to have been able to dine in a lot of really, really, good vegan establishments, so we have pretty high expectations. The days when "vegan" meant "bland," "underseasoned," "hippy" cuisine are long past, or so we thought. I guess there are still some places out there that are stuck in the 70s...definitely Green fits that description. I was a bit taken aback, after looking at the website and reading about "Chef Damon's" vision, to find myself in a tiny hole in the wall waiting in line for counter service, though I could have gotten past that had the food been stellar. I was further taken aback to discover that the place apparently doesn't have a liquor license...the only drink alternatives were bottled and cannned sodas from the cooler and a couple of fruity iced teas. Still, if the food had been good... I ordered something that isn't on the on-line menu. It was described as blackened faux chicken in a grilled pita with lettuce, tomato, and tahini. My husband ordered the Argentine Po'Boy with Thyme Fries. We also ordered some samosas to share. We both, reluctantly, grabbed bottled drinks from the cooler. Almost immediately after we'd sat down, my sandwich and the order of samosas came out of the kitchen. We waited for a bit, thinking that surely my husband's sandwich would be along shortly, but after several minutes of waiting, tucked into the samosas. They were OK...not bad; nothing to write home about. To be honest, they tasted as if they'd come out of a freezer box. Any Indian restaurant can do them better, and if you don't absolutely have to be dairy free, that's where I'd recommend you go, if samosas are what you're craving. The samosas consumed, we sat, and sat some more. My husband finally urged me to get started on my sandwich, which was rapidly cooling, and we both tried a bite of the faux chicken. It was, I have to say, really unpleasant. There was no sign of any blackening seasonings having been used...no sign of any seasoning at all, really. It had an oddly fishy taste to it (too much seaweed in the kombu, maybe?), and was much tougher than most chicken analogs. The pita (which was actually flatbread) didn't appear to have been grilled at all...it was dried out to the point of being crunchy, and there were no grill marks on it at all. The only real flavor in the sandwich (other than the odd, fishy, taste of the analog) came from the tahini. I finally gave up on the whole thing as not being worth the effort of chewing. My husband's sandwich finally came out, well after I'd given up on mine. I took a bite of the faux beef, and it was OK. It reminded me of the faux beef strips you can buy at Trader Joes. The fries that came with were nicely crispy (shoestring style), but there was not even a hint of thyme about them. They'd do best to just call them "French Fries" and have done with it. My take? If you're a vegetarian, you'd do better to eat at Lalibela. If you're a vegan...well, this place will keep you alive, but you'll pay more than it's worth and, if you're familiar with really good vegan cuisine, you won't be happy with it. If this is the best Scottsdale has to offer vegans, you're better off cooking at home.
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