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  • The Marquee Theatre is pretty much like going to your horrible mother-in-laws house. Its a terrible idea that you fret over.. But you go because there is some bomb ass reward, like a home cooked meal, chocolate mousse pie and a bottle of champagne not even your wealthiest friend could afford, and because well, you have to, to keep your marriage together. The Marquee is like this. I go because one of the loves of my music life are playing a show there and I wouldn't miss it for the world.. I cant miss it! I basically hate every single thing about this place. I literally get bummed out when my favorite bands pass through Phoenix and choose to play at this shithole. The sound sucks, the bar is almost impossible to get through to, order 2 at a time to be safe, and don't expect the bartenders to be friendly. I know there are a million people there trying to get drunk, but come on, laugh a little bit. Do something besides yell and question my completely legit ID. Its hot, dirty, the bathroom situation is a disaster. I don't even know how so many grown ass women can destroy a bathroom like the ones at Marquee, but I think it might be safe to assume dudes use the ladies room from time to time. Either that or bitches are peeing on the floor and TeePeeing the stalls for fun. Its absolutely baffling. Lines are long, parking is a nightmare, your best bet is to park elsewhere and walk. Don't piss off the security guards either, they are all obviously raging roid monkeys that will kick you out for even looking at them wrong. And one thing I HATE the most, they stamp your hands so much that it looks like a 4 year old took a box of markers to your hand, with ink that doesn't come off for 4 days. Cant you just give me a neon colored wrist band and call it a day? I have enough ink on my body as it is. Like I said, I only come here because I have no choice, and yes, I will continue to come here.. I just hope one day Phoenix opens up a venue comparable to the size of Marquee, but actually turn it into a place you want to go to, not just because you have to. The end.
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