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| - I am writing this review based on an experience years ago that was enough of an turn-off for me to stop going here again and from recommending it to others, and a recent similar experience from a buddy reminded me once again of it. It's pathetic really, how I would like to tell friends Dangerous Dan's is the place to get the best greasy burger in the city when asked (because it's the only place that comes to my mind, even though it has that reputation anyways--it's the closest thing we have to Vegas' infamous Heart Attack Grill), but I cannot.
These folks have been serving handmade patties long before gourmet burgers became a trend. The burgers here are big, cheap, decadent and shamelessly greasy. Not holy grail good, but satisfying enough to put your hunger to shame. Maybe a bit too greasy--by contrast their poutine is one of the worse and most tasteless I had, but damn they give you a lot. They show no shame in serving the infamous "Quadruple C" meal (the kind of extreme food worthy of a Man vs. Food episode), in taking pot shots at vegetarians and references to the munchies (is it 4:20 yet?), and in their grimy dive diner decor and iconic car seats (which I find to be hilarious and unique).
Apparently that entitled sense of don't-give-a-damn, it's-my-way-or-the-highway extends to the quality of service you get here, or lack thereof. I can tolerate being totally ignored except when requesting service, but I draw the line at "would you like a dose of complacent bitchiness to go with your fries with that?"
When you walk in to dine in, you are greeted with the grumpy voice of a thickly bearded man (who i believe is the owner, but could be wrong) who reminds you to place your order at front; they explicitly do not do table service. They expect your party to order before claiming a table, rather than claim a table before deciding what to get--impractical since there isn't a lot of space to maneuver at the entrance where the cashier's at.
The treatment I recall getting the last time I ever ate here was the guy rolling his eyes and being less than helpful when a friend asked about toppings, and exclaiming, "C'mon guys, hurry it up, I don't have all day to take orders," when it came to my turn. Clearly their way of doing things isn't working. And oh, we got to hear the guy berate a staff for a mistake. This isn't Hell's Kitchen, is it?
Those who are regulars or have thick skin can probably get past this jerk customer service attitude problem, but I find it fucking off-putting--he is more of a jerk than even the rudest TTC driver I have encountered. Holy fuck, I'd prefer pretentious hipster attitude over these guys' brand of service. Now imagine if you were new--you might just feel like you and everyone else at the "Double D" is dumb and a damned burden for coming here.
It's to say in summary, in terms of service, Dan's is hopelessly terminally fucked.
Yeah, I'm not gonna bloody bother frequenting businesses that displays that kind of dick attitude; I don't care how good the stuff is. Yet it amazes me this establishment continues to thrive to this day despite the well-documented rude-ass contemptuous reputation. Which I attribute to the business they get from burger aficionados and hipsters (many stumbling in hungry after a gig at the nearby Opera House, or perhaps drunkenly and stoned-to-oblivion mistaken Riverside for Parkdale), and some TV appearances (including on Burger Wars, which they didn't win). There's quite some complacency from what I gathered.
This local hipster-magnet "burger institution" is in my neighborhood, and every time I walk past it I see signs on the door expressing passive-aggressive disdain for non-customers using the toilet and people standing at the door (see attached image), which says a lot about the general misanthropic outlook of Dangerous Dan's. I suppose they see no reason to get their fucking act together. Why is it that the most highly raved about and highly recommended burger joints in Toronto are ones where I have been severely less than impressed?!
If you want to make a pilgrimage to the "Double D" and can get past the potentially off-putting service attitude, be my guest. Good thing they offer takeout and delivery around the area. May be a good idea to be sure your life insurance policy is up to date.
{TTC: If you know how to get to Jilly's by streetcar, then therefore you know how to get to Dan's by streetcar! I don't all day to give you public transit instructions. }
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