Conversation in VIP room;
Her: I can't go out with you after work - I only have the sitter til 2.
Me: Aw, baby, c'mon, call the sitter, tell her you'll pay her overtime.
Her: Can't. Maybe we can go out next Tuesday. I get off early.
Me: You always say that but Tuesday will come around and you'll have some new excuse why you can't go out with me.
Her: (being witty) Nuh-uh.
Me: Yeah, huh. (equally witty response)
Her: I'll tell you what, I'll go out with you if you pay for the sitter, pay me what I lose out in tips for the night, and take me to a nice place; like Outback.
I pause to do some mental math.
Her: Do we have a deal?
Me: What say I just give you fifty bucks and you beej me in the parking lot after work.
Her: Fuck you, you pig.
Me: Whaat?? What did I say? - Wait - come back - I'll throw in a few extra singles for formula.