| rev:text
| - How does this guy have a 5-star rating?
Me and a small crew had inquired about copping some jet-skis to do some victory laps around Lake Erie to celebrate the Cavs championship like a bunch of douchebags. When we initially called the dude was kind of sketchy about being open, and told us to come by the next day. That's fine, it's his shack in The Flats, and if he doesn't want to be there for a day, I fully understand.
So the next day (today) we arrived and stated we had previously called about the jet-skis. He immediately went into his "ahhh...jeeez, I dunno, lemmie check *moves a few pieces of paper around and flips a page on a clipboard up, looks at his cell phone* man, I'm actually waiting for a guy to get down here." Besides the fact that this was likely 50% bullshit, and he had known he could probably expect us, it was weird that he pretended like we didn't call less than 24 hours before.
THEN, once we finally agree to wait for the mystery dude to arrive so we can rent these jet-skis, he drops the mind-blowing info-bomb that there is a $1000 deposit on jet-skis for a ONE HOUR RENTAL.
So, here's a quick list of things I could buy for $1100 (plus tax!) instead of renting a jet-ski off this guy for one hour:
- A reasonable sedan, possibly an SUV from Enterprise (that's including the security deposit :)
- On the right day, a flight to Berlin or a European city of my choice, round trip w/tax.
- a really nice bicycle.
- a decent limo ride, or a hot air balloon ride, or buy all my friends tickets for the Goodtime III.
and here's a list of things I'd rather do than let this guy hold $1000 of my money for even an hour:
- shut my hand in a door.
- eat at Melt.
- smoke bath salts with my grandma.
This dude is a punisher. Straight up. He should change the name of this place to "Shack of Unaffordable Small Crafts" or "House of Lies". Maybe even just "Punishers" is best, to avoid any kind of confusion so you know exactly what this dude is about. His shack is in the low level canto layers of "Dantes Inferno" Cleveland Edition, you see a lake and it's a nice day but dude asks for $1k+ to take it for a spin. Why even ask somebody to hand over $1100 for one hour on a jet-ski? Who would do that? If you have $1100 to let sit in debit card purgatory you probably already own one or even multiple jet-skis! Instead of renting a jet-ski for one hour from Great Lakes Water Sports, just save some extra cash, go on Craigslist and just buy one.
Extra star because dude is sitting in a shack.
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