rev:text
| - You know how I know Total and Wine & More is neither helpful (like a small boutique) nor carries an "endless" selection of beverages (like a warehouse store)? Because they run national radio advertisements saying that they are helpful (like a small boutique) and carry an "endless" selection of beverages (like a warehouse store). Visiting TW&M is more like visiting Dimpus Burger in Super Troopers.
I was looking for a specific beer that I had tried and, knowing it may be a tough find in the valley, I hit up TW&M. I was armed with: the name of the beer, the country of origin, and a honest sense of humility. After briefly pursuing the beer selection, I realized I was not going to find this on my own and approached the employee who was scanning a couple shelf items. I said I was looking for a beer and asked if he could help me find it.
"I don't know. Maybe." Thanks for the vote of confidence, Guy Who Should Be Working at Total Mutton Chops & More Mustache Accessories.
I tell him the name and where it is brewed. I expect him to key it up in his little computer and give me an aisle and shelf location. Instead he says, literally, just "No." I guess he knows the entire selection of TW&M by heart. Impressive stuff for a guy just told he didn't know if he'd be able to help me.
He then asks in his in-store communicator if they carry it. The tone was very condescending -- as if I had walked in and asked if they carried Bridgestone Tires or Newport Cigarettes. "Do we have a litre of cola?" would have been more sincere.
It comes back that they do not have it. "Yeah we don't have it." (Quite the limitless selection -- like a warehouse store). He then turns his back to me and returns to his scanning. Doesn't offer to help me find another selection. Doesn't ask if I had tried the beer and wanted to see if we could find something similar (you know, like the small boutique service with the experts TW&M claims to have).
I ended up grabbing another beer that I could find (and I know I could have gotten at my local boutique shop) and, as I walked the through the store, generally noticed that the "impressive selection" of TW&M includes an entire case committed to Miller products and a a vodka aisle that is 60% Stolichnaya and Absolute-flavored vodkas. The whiskey aisle is dominated by a Fireball display and is surrounded by other cinnamon-flavored whisky knock offs. Such wonderful options for the discerning pallet...of an ASU freshman who has somehow ventured into central Phoenix.
So -- no service, underwhelming selection, and nothing special about their prices. Total Wine & More is, as expected, all marketing and no substance.
|