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| - Ah, Famous Dave's. I ask, what is it Dave's is famous for?
Is it the architecture? Can't be, the outside of the place looks like Pizza Hut meets Red Lobster (circa 1978).
Is it the decor? Not unless you get awards for a Bass Pro Shops Cracker Barrel (or TGI Fridays) mash up.
Was it the hostess? Maybe, we were greeted promptly and immediately offered a booth in the bar. When I declined and said we preferred a table, we were led to the opposite side of the building and offered a table there; instead of the one I had been standing six inches from when the booth was offered. Sooooo, not the hostessing either.
I know, the menu, Dave's is famous for the menu, looks good, tries to promote the food and is laid out well......wait, that last one is a lie.....Not the menu.
Hmmmmm.......this is allegedly a restaurant, so maybe, just maybe, it's the food Dave's is so rightly famous for! Alas, no.
The food is abysmal and miserable to put it kindly.
My wife and I each ordered the two meat lunch special, which is your choice of two meat like substances and a single side item. Now, for a mere $2.49 you can order an additional side item; which I gamely did as most places have decent side items, especially BBQ joints. Well, was I in for a surprise, unfortunately. I asked for the ribs and brisket with fries and cole-slaw. What red-blooded American wouldn't love that?
Unfortunately, that would be this one. What I got was teriyaki beef jerky disguised as brisket and TWO, count them, TWO measly ribs. The brisket was probably cooked correctly at some point in it's life, but by the time it was presented to me, it was no longer identifiable. But, I was hungry, and my jaws needed the circuit training, so I chewed, come to think of it, it's two hours later and I am still chewing on at least one piece. The ribs were greasy, in the name of all that is holy in smoking, how in the hell do you make ribs greasy? Famous Dave's staff wear shirts with cute little slogans, like "Good BBQ is all smoke and beers", I have news, they think enough beers are going to cover up the lack of good smoke. While I am talking about my lunch, let me also touch on the slaw, don't; just don't. The "fries" were edible, if unseasoned in any way. I tried all of the sauces, hoping something would improve this Rocky Horror BBQ show on my plate, but I can't stress how bad they were. I seriously think they bought the cheapest BBQ like stuff they could find at food4less or some other high quality dings and dents grocers and put just enough habanero sauce in it to call something else. I have received better BBQ sauces from Del Taco for chicken fingers. Then when I thought things couldn't get any worse, I looked to see what chicanery they had pulled on my blushing bride celebrating the glories of her own birth. She had gamely ordered the chicken, brisket, slaw, and mashed potatoes. Her description of the chicken to me was, "Not bad, it's edible" Wow, that is a screaming endorsement, someone call the papers! (Please note the sarcasm filter). She also received the beef jerky. When our waitress ( think Olive Oyl with the voice of Minnie Mouse) asked my blushing bride how our food was, my demur wife said to Minnie,"the brisket is tough and dry." To which Minnie emoted dismayed shock and offered my wife some Au Jus (pronounced Awe Juice) to remedy the situation. My wife agreed, while I sat there scratching my head trying to figure out what the hell just happened.
About 8 minutes later, the Awe Juice arrived, it was warmer than the meat at this point, and my wife tried to soften the leather on her plate to no avail. She wound up giving it to the dog (me) to eat. When Minnie finally came back, she said she was sorry my wife didn't like trying to eat leather and offered her something else. (The only reason I know she apologized was because I had CC on for the hearing impaired). My wife declined the offer of more ruined meat byproducts and instead turned her attention to her sides, the slaw and the mashed potatoes. The slaw received a hearty "meh" but had the distinction of being edible and almost palatable. All of our hopes now rested on the mashed potatoes, and were about to be dashed. Mash potatoes are not known for being overly flavorful, but no flavor at all? I could have saved over $30.00 and dined on glue stix by Elmer's.
So, if not the architecture, the decor, the welcome, the food, or the service, then just what in the hell is Dave's famous for?
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