rev:text
| - Do you remember that scene from Clerks where Randal arrives at Big Choice Video and falls to his knees in gratitude and amazement? That's how I felt when I found this brand-new GetGo. To call it a convenience store would be an utter disservice to a 24-hour sandwich shop with wifi-enabled café.
They even have computerized milkshake-stirring machines. No, I'm not kidding, you use a touchscreen to tell the milkshake-robot how thick you like it. Just you wait until that technology gets to the adult toy industry.
My ex-yinzer wife sent me in -- poor little ole me, a Florida boy who's spent his life in the Shallow South (that's Miami, Tampa, and Atlanta, far from the sticks) -- to get Snyder's chips and iced tea in a paper container. First of all, I didn't know the H in Snyder's was invisible, so I failed to pronounce it like Schneider's. Oops. Second of all, GetGo doesn't sell Snyder's chips, they sell Giant Eagle chips. Oops. And they don't sell carton tea, either. Oops.
You ready to hear what these nice folks did? The manager handed me a bag of Giant Eagle brand chips AND a fountain iced tea for my wife FOR FREE.
mfw: lolwut.gif.
Well, you better believe I went back to a GetGo the next time I needed a drink. And I discovered a cookie-marshmallow sandwich my ex-yinzer wife calls "gobbers".
Excuse me, my pancreas is trying to strangle me from the inside.
|