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  • WARNING: GIANT BLACK HAIR IN FOOD!!! I wish could give this place negative stars, not just for the disgustingness of the above statement, but for the handling of the situation afterward. We ordered Yogi's for takeout for our family of 3 fairly good eaters. I was only a few bites into my large Teriyaki chicken/beef combo, when my fork produced a THICK, 10-INCH LONG BLACK HAIR. Nothing is quite as awe-inspiring as a LONG BLACK HAIR, DRIPPING TERIYAKI SAUCE, on the fork you had been putting into your mouth. Yum. So impressive was this sight, in fact, that it inspired my entire family to throw their food away and eat PBJs for the night. I'm not unreasonable. And I get that, even in this age of Health Compliance, Hairnets, and Ponytails, sh*t happens. Just be a little more careful next time and give me my money back. NOPE! I called YOGI's to let them know I wasn't interested in their hair products. A polite, yet ineffective kid answered the phone. After telling me the manager, Brian, was gone for the evening he asked why I needed the manager, and "MAYBE" he could help. He couldn't, but that didn't stop him from wanting to hear the whole story before letting me know that. He told me to call back the next day at 5PM. NOPE! "Sorry, you just missed him. Try again this time tomorrow." NOPE! "sorry." The day after that I called at 2:30 just to give Brian a little well-deserved nap time. NOPE! "Wow, he never leaves this early." Truly a fascinating oddity. Next day, 11:30AM, "dees bryn." F**KING GREAT!! You see, Brian apparently doesn't speak English very well. I have absolutely no problem with other cultures or people seeking their pot of gold in America. In fact, I think it's great. It's just difficult to communicate OVER THE PHONE, with somebody who knows 12 words of English. Next thing I know, the kid is back on the phone, acting as Brian's semi-translator. They let me know that, if I can get there before 5pm (this is a work day), and produce my receipt from 4 days ago, BRIAN WILL LOOK AT IT. Not provide me with a fee meal, or give me back my money. LOOK AT IT. F*CK the ranger, Boo Boo? NO F*CK YOU, YOGI's. I won't be back.
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