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http://www.openvoc.eu/poi#funnyReviews
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http://www.openvoc.eu/poi#usefulReviews
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  • "If you want to view paradise, simply look around and view it!" Willy Wonka didn't lie when he sang about candy transporting the eater to a euphoric, utopian state. Although, his Chocolate Factory was riddled with Oompa Loompas, whereas here at sugar factory, you'll be bombarded by a flock of barely legal coeds in miniskirts who prance around licking lollipops and pouring Pixie Stix over theirs heads in slow motion to the eternal soundtrack of "Take My Breath Away." These voluptuous vixens tantalize the customer and operate utilizing tactics of ultimate distraction. On numerous occasions, I have walked into Sugar factory expecting a routine gummy run, when suddenly a jelly bean nymph would pop out of the nearest vat of Charleston Chews and into my direct path. "Can I help you find something sweet today?" she asked with sugar-encrusted, revolving, spiral red and white peppermint eyes. "Uh, I um..." "You look like you need some help. Why don't we go get some candy together?" Her voice was smoother than a rippling stream of liquefied Werther's Originals. By this point, I had lost my motive entirely, and surrendered to her corn syrupy trance. This story ends with me walking out with 18 pounds of candy and a question mark for a head. I didn't know where I was. Had I been mugged? Did I enter a new dimension? Am I a giant piece of candy? Whatever the case, I had been duped by the Sugar Factory Gum Drop Sprites and was now forced to walk around in public with industrial-sized satchels of edible death. Whoever runs that little hut of temptation is a very brilliant individual. -Joey Pipes
http://www.openvoc.eu/poi#coolReviews
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