I was in Las Vegas. I figured Strip Club is one of those things you just gotta do. Because Vegas. But to be honest, I hadn't set foot inside a Strip Club since I'd gotten a mortgage nearly a decade ago. Prior to entering a strip club, I'd retrieved $100 from an ATM nearby. I'd remembered ridiculous ATM fees at the last strip club I'd been too. So I entered the scenario prepared.
So I actually had to go to 3 strip clubs before finding one that was open. (It was Christmas Eve after all) I totally got strip clubs closing on Christmas Eve. Even strippers deserve to be at home on Christmas Eve. But this place was open. I paid the $20 entry fee. ($80 bucks left) I walked in, and there was a hot girl on the stage shaking her thing, and a girl on the couch by the entryway. Girl on couch introduced herself as Alexis, and welcomed me back inside a strip club on behalf of strippers everywhere.
I'm not going to go into detail here, because my mom reads my yelp reviews. But I walked out about fifteen minutes later because I had given the remainder of my money to Alexis. Alexis was nice and pretty and hot and nice....and pretty. But ya. Um. Boobs.
Thank you Alexis, and hot girl on stage and Diamond Cabaret for staying open on Christmas Eve.