| rev:text
| - Alright. I admit it. I was wrong. Honestly, I don't know what the hell was up my ass the last time I reviewed this place, oh, almost exactly 4 years ago to the date of this most recent visit. Perhaps I was having a particularly shitty day. Perhaps I had just learned that in four years Kevin James would be given another network sitcom. Or maybe I was replaced by my evil self and didn't realize it. Whatever, man, there's no way around it. I couldn't have been wrong-er.
Red Wine & Brew is simply one of the greatest beer shops that I've ever been to, really.
What makes it so great? Well, really one thing makes it so great. Beer. It's like someone created a giant being out of beer and then made its brain out of beer and then they aimed a shrink ray at me and reduced me to the size of a mouse and injected me into the ear of this monstrous beer-being and I was wandering inside its giant beer brain. You might think that's hyperbole, but that's simply because you haven't been here yet. There's a ridiculous amount of beer crammed into this relatively small space. What a minute, wasn't that what I complained about in my last review? OK, so I'm completely changing my mind here.
Something else I complained about last time was inattentive service. Really? This coming from the guy that generally dislikes being around other people and pretty much avoids them at all costs, especially when I'm shopping for beer. I, I simply feel ashamed that I wrote that last review. Sure, we weren't greeted by some smiling buffoon with a joker smile, arms outstretched looking to ensnare us in some kind of grandma hug. But that's a good thing. A simple hello, a nod, and that's it. Perfect. If I've got a question, I know where you are. The staff was great. End of story.
Not shopper friendly? Yet another myth busted. I was quickly able to locate the empty 6-pack holders and I'm sure if I really wanted something bigger I could have asked the clerk. God, I was such a jerk four years ago.
As for the knock I gave them on their organizational skills, I wasn't really sure what I was expecting. Some kind of Dewey Decimal, card catalog? A transparent sheet of lucite upon which was projected a holographic tour guide that would be at my beck and call to help me find that Slovenian Oud Bruin I've been wanting to try? Whatever. I wandered happily from cooler to shelf and back again never really caring.
Looking back, I also bitched about these guys being overpriced. I swear, I must have been high on dickhead enhancers or something. Red, Wine & Brew are priced right on par with just about every other craft beer bottle shop in Northeast Ohio. Sure, they've got some really rare, foreign beers that'll set you back a pretty penny, but so does everyone else. Too expensive? Maybe compared to that yellow, fizzy shit beer that the masses drink (they've got that, too, if you wanna slum it). I love good beer and I am willing to pay more for it. Done.
If you are a beer geek, hell, even if you're just dipping your pinkie toe into the good beer pool, your mind will be blown with the wonders that await you within these walls. There are few places that can lay claim to having a big, swinging selection of beer that'll melt your brain within seconds. They can and they do. I only hope that they'll forgive me for my clearly inexplicable lapse in judgement and reason back in 2012. It wasn't you, it was me.
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