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  • Cowboy hats are like hemorrhoids. Sooner or later every asshole gets one. With that in mind, I had to have one and I set out to find me a Target that had some so of course I headed out to the east side where lots of hillbillies live. I wanted the hat, the boots and a set of those horns to mount on the front of your car like in a Burt Reynolds movie. The store is bigger than most but has less stuff in it. They have more floors and less floorspace. They sell high-quality Chinese things and shrinky clothes made in yucky places on the more squalid side of the world. They sell food too but I think it is made here in the United States. I support the troops, so there's that. And I don't just mean I support them with my tax dollars, I mean I support them with my words as well. God Bless everyone is what I say. Target sells good DVDs too and I bought me some yoga DVDs and not just to slo-mo on the girls who strain and wiggle around. I like to do yoga and this is target. I went to the target on the east side, you see, so I had to buy something a bit more high-brow. A buck fifty for some namaste sporties who look like they'd even talk to you in an accent. Awesome. And I don't say that a lot. I did not find a cowboy hat so if you are looking for one don't go here. And I did not find any size fifteen cowboy boots nor the horn thingy for the front of the car. I don't even care. three stars: one for the troops, one for the yoga video and one for the escalator you can put carts on and then stay down on the lower floor.
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