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| - I wish I'd stayed here in its heyday, back when this Egyptian-themed hotel actually had a goddamn Egyptian theme. Do they really think people come to Vegas and stay in a giant pyramid because they want it to have a modern decor? Gimme a break.
I booked a pyramid suite for 3 nights here because it was relatively cheap (around $80 night BEFORE resort fees) and because I'd always been curious about staying here.
Self parking is around back. Do yourself a favor and park on the top level, since the bottom level parking is a dank, musty maze that you'll realize requires you to find an elevator to go up one level anyway.
Why is check-in so slow at every single hotel? Don't you people want me liquored up and gambling asap?
We were on the 30th floor, and the inclinator (they aren't elevators because they move at an angle) for the 30th floor is inconveniently far away from everything. It is also slow.
I give them major props for making the pictures of our suite look amazing on the website, whereas the reality is a dressed-up Motel 6 room with a big tub and some Egyptian hieroglyphics. Their modern renovation clearly wasn't thought out, since the room looked like it couldn't decide whether to be chic or Egyptian (like, you know, everyone who stays here would expect). It just looks... well, pathetic, really. And there's virtually nothing on the walls. Any excitement it may have once possessed has had its brain removed and it now sits, mummified, in some storage room.
Speaking of the tub (aka half the reason I booked this suite), it no longer has any jets, and the side panel for maintenance was hanging off, revealing a cavernous lair of decrepit pipes. Way to make an entrance, guys.
Our a/c unit was leaking so much that the carpet was sopping wet as far as a foot away from it. I was going to call the front desk and have them change our room, but I'd also already set up my makeshift bar and started drinking, so I just went all ghetto and put a couple towels on the floor.
Bathrooms are surprisingly large and spacious, but the showerhead is a cheap piece of crap.
No wi-fi... unless you want to pay $20/day. I have a hard time typing that without laughing. Who the fuck are they kidding? This is 2013; reservations are made based on wi-fi availability in many cases.
They do have a fully kick ass gym, though! And it's always empty. Lots of free weights, cable machines, dumbbells, cardio equipment, etc. I was seriously impressed since I've been to better hotels that aren't half this good.
I know staying here is cheap and all, but unless you have no discernible sense of taste I'd recommend dropping your cash elsewhere. Without the Egyptian theme at play here it just feels like any other hotel. Well, any other CHEAP ASS hotel. And it's so far away from the "meat" of the Strip that you'll be cabbing it every night.
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