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| - Seeing as it is Decemburger, and after reading my friend Dale M's review, I thought I had better check this place out.
I come from the shwa. The land of basics. Where good unpretentious (and somewhat funny/odd) burger places run a plenty. So to impress me, this place was gonna have to be fantastic. It wasn't.
I did have high hopes when I walked in and thought I was in the shwa. Looks like shwa meat, must taste like shwa meat. Alas, no. But I will get to that in a moment.
What made it look shwa was that it was stuck in the '70s. A prerequisite for a fine shwa burger dive. Plus, when I went to the Burger Shack, it was all men, except for one haggard woman. There is a lot of haggard women in the shwa. I was also greeted with cold customer service by the cashier. Again, quite apparent in the shwa.
I ordered a milkshake that I could have made at home - and better - with beating a piece of bakers chocolate against the floor and pouring some milk over it.
The fries however were great! Really liked the fries.
The burger - wtf. When I ordered, there were 2 options for burger patties. When I inquired, one was fresh and one was frozen. Really?! Who opts for the frozen one?!
The topping bowls are just like the shwa. When I knew I may be in trouble, is when the man who topped my burger was polite. That is never a good sign.
I swear the burger had filler in it. And not fill-er-up good, but filler of an unknown variety. It had a bit of a sage-y taste. Not too sure what it was. It was also cooked to a hockey puck consistency. Again, not good.
For those of you that are still reading and are familiar with suburban/country lingo....here is how my dad would rate this place:
Cock sucker that parkin lot is like a dog fucking a football*. If I had my ol half tonne** she woulda had a hard time fitin in der. The place is pretnear*** like the ones at home, so why the fuck would you drive into the city for a son of a bitch burger? At least with the city you wouldn't have to worry bout skitters**** in the summer like we do at home. Plus, I would only drive in here early Saurdee***** afternoon before the fucking crowds and lineups. The milkshake tastes like pony piss and the burger is cooked exactly how I like it, shoe leather.
________________________________________
*tight quarters
**a pick up truck
***pretty close to
****mosquitoes
*****Saturday
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