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  • Have I been arrested for a crime that I didn't commit? I mean why am I being subjected to this prison food. Granted I came here of my own volition so I guess that's a crime that I did commit. Portions are small. And this is coming from someone who rarely finishes a bowl of pho and usually takes half her entrees to go. Small can be forgivable. But these portions are also... oh, how do I put this lightly... shockingly un-delicious. You can't have both. Either be bountiful and shitty tasting. Or be delicious and small. (oh hi honey... no, not you. Never you!) I LOVE the concept of Made Foods and really wanted this to be on the rotation as it would be fantastic for those busy nights. So we gave it a good college try and bought several portions for about $90. (Seriously. $90. Someone should be arrested here.) And several portions turned out to be... 6. Yeah, so value this is not. We tried it for lunch one day and Mr. Anastasia had to eat two portions. He was furious. First, because they were bland. And then because he had to endure a second one just for the semblance of full. So that's about $30 of un-deliciousness under duress without any real prison lovin'. And lastly probably because I called him Mr. Anastasia. Let me put it to you another way, we received a card in the mail to try a free meal from the Made Foods by our house and just threw it away. Or did we eat the postcard? Either way would be a better experience. Have I actually been in a prison? Well, no. But I've seen enough shit go down during chow time on Prison Break. And Orange is the New Black. Oh and that Oz phase. So I'm pretty much an expert and I declare: If you lack taste buds and got money to burn, come here. (But literally taking a torch to cash might be more fun and fulfilling. You've been warned, fish.)
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