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  • Never has a restaurant left more of an impression on me. Hands down the worst meal I have ever eaten and the worst $20 I have ever spent. I have never felt worse after a meal or left more dissatisfied. You could not pay me $20 to eat the food I ordered again. We were starving. Neither of us had eaten all day. The first thing we did was order the Nachos. It came with "Nacho" liquid cheese you find at gas stations and sporting events. I am talking the pasty orange processed shit, pun fucking intended. They dumped this shit all over a giant plate of chips and sprinkled on some seasoned ground beef and charged us $9. N-I-N-E FUCKING DOLLARS. If I'm paying $9 for tortilla chips and cheese, I expect actual cheese, not processed liquid cheese that I can buy at Costco in eighty pound bags for $15. That's 10 cents an ounce. There was *maybe* 3 ounces of cheese on my chips. That's 30 cents of cheese which is arguably the most expensive ingredient of the dish. The entire plate of nachos probably cost them $1. We did not finish them. We each ate around six or seven Nacho cheese coated chips before we were saved by our entrees. Lucky us, or so we thought. Apparently "smothered" burritos actually means fucking coated with Nacho cheese. Fuck. You can tell I really hate this shit. Let's move on. My $14 entree consisted of 2 tacos, 1 mini burrito, and a chimichanga. The beef in my tacos was ground fine. Real fine. So fine that you could no longer tell what part of the cow a particular granule came from. All I can say was that it was better than the refried beans of the "just add water" variety. Not joking. The beans were the texture of a watery soup. I think the cook added too much water to mine because when I got the plate the beans were on the left side. By the end of the meal they had oozed across the entire plate like a thick viscous creature. Like all "just add water" refried beans of jail cafeteria quality, it tasted like cardboard. The chicken taco was edible. I think. I ate it at least. I was starving though. Again, we hadn't eaten all day. I didn't touch the Nacho cheese coated burritos. I tried the chimichanga last. I had two bites. The rice was the best thing on the plate. The service was as good as it possibly could have been. You could tell the servers did not like working there. Our server didn't bring us the check. He had the busser/dishwasher bring us the check. I don't blame him. Honestly, we felt sorry for him.
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