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  • I almost don't want to do this review because I am afraid more people will catch on and take all my cheap coconut waters. But in the spirit of YELP! and all we yelpers stand for, I've decided to spread the news about this little find. Whatever you need, shop here first. I mean it (unless you need ice, then shop here last). Most of the stuff is .99 OR under. I bought probably 6 cases of chocolate flavored coconut water here. The big ones. the big NAME BRAND ones. The 1 liter Zico ones that I priced at the supermarket next door; they were charging 6.59 ON SALE for the same exact drink. But not 99 Cents Only Stores. I bought my choco-coco-h2o for, you guessed it, 99 cents. Theres really something for everybody here. Want to wash your car? Great selection of soaps and sponges and little lint free cloths. Like frozen foods? Banquet pot pies and frozen burritos and little yummy looking fruit pies and a ton more, most for UNDER .99 cents. Like canned foods? Yeah, good luck carrying all that bounty up the stairs to your apartment after stocking up on the beans and salsas around here. Eat sardines like a sailor? Knock yourself out, Captain Ahab. I bet you've never seen such a selection. And although I've discovered that the sardines packed in mustard aren't for me, I won't judge you for buying them in bulk. Like ice in your drink? Or are you like me and have a bag you rub all over yourself all the time because you can't stand this infernal climate? if you do, or are, then have I got news for you. A 7lb bag of good premium ice will cost you, that's right, .99 cents. I buy one everyday just to sleep with. Like a cool body pillow. Or a frozen corpse. Whatever. You write letters? BAM! All the stationary you can handle. You'll be writing letters until long after the USPS shuts down, which will probably be very soon. Throwing a Birthday Party? You're in luck. Everything you need right here. Throwing a Quinceanera? You're in even greater luck. I swear I once saw a pinata at this place, and you guessed it, it was .99 cents. Sweet tooth? All name brand candy .59 cents. That's right, I now have a trunk full of sweet tarts and abba-zabbas. And I ain't sharing. Let's see Walmart make me this happy. Impossible. Give it up to the new Royalty of Retail. And please, shop them first.
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